5 Steps to Slide Into Her DMs Without Being Creepy

There’s someone on Instagram that you like.

And you’d really like to chat with her and hopefully meet up in real life.

That’s why I’m going to tell you how to successfully slide into her DMs in 5 steps.

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Important: Quickly letting you know I found the best opener EVER. Its psychologically irresistible to ignore. I made a video explaining how to use it and it's 'clickbait-principle' with screenshot examples. Check it out here.

How to slide into her DMs in 5 steps

This is the most effective system to slide into a girl’s DMs and get a positive reaction.

  • Step 1: Have a decent profile.
  • Step 2: Follow her.
  • Step 3: Engage her profile with likes and/or comments.
  • Step 4: Wait for the perfect moment.
  • Step 5: Slide into her DMs using my technique.

Alternatively, you can skip steps 2, 3, and 4, and just slide. You’ll have way lower chances of success. But you’ll save time. More on that later.

Step 1. Put some effort into your Instagram profile

I get countless emails from guys like you, asking about DM slides. And I have to disappoint at least half of them.

You can’t slide just any girl’s direct messages and expect it to work.

You need to have a good Instagram profile first.

Look, there’s just no way that you’ll get the attention of a popular woman on Instagram if your profile doesn’t look fun at all.

Women get SOAKED in attention online. Way more than in real life.

Why? Because walking up to a girl in the street demands guts. It’s terrifying.

But sliding into a girl’s DMs behind the safety of your screen? That’s easy. Even for the biggest coward.

Have a look at my girlfriend’s IG inbox:

Obviously, it isn’t like this for every girl. It depends on the size of her following.

There’s a reason rappers happily sing about their new crush having a small IG account. It means they’ll have an easier time seducing her.

But all this does give you a reality check. If you don’t put effort into your profile, women won’t take you very seriously.

IMPORTANT: To have an attractive Instagram you DON’T need:

  • To be good-looking.
  • Do expensive things.
  • Have a professional camera.

I’ll show you how you can have an attractive profile without any of those luxuries.

The best Instagram profiles use my FAT-Method:

  1. FUN (Your life is a doorway into a new exciting world). If she’s already having the same or better life experiences than you, why would she want to hang out with you?
  2. ATTRACTIVE (not necessarily good-looking).  If you can capture all your emotional highs on camera, then you’ll look sexy.
  3. TRUSTWORTHY. If your profile radiates warm and kind vibes, the idea of meeting you feels more comfortable. So be sure to smile and show that you care about things other than yourself (pets, family and friends).

Here’s an example of an Instagram profile with an attractive vibe, even though the guy who owns it is totally average looking.

Photos that do well on dating apps usually do well on Instagram and vice versa. So if you want to know how to get the perfect set of pictures, check out these:

Step 2: Follow her

Don’t hide in the shadows. Let her know you exist. Follow her profile!

Go ahead and practice by clicking the follow button on my profile:

Click on this link and follow me for ‘quality content’. But mostly just so I get more followers and have an easier time sliding DMs myself.

If her profile is public, you can just follow.

If her profile is private, you’ll have to wait until she accepts your follow-request.

Once you’ve given her a follow, it’s time for Step 3.

Step 3: Engage her profile

This step is where many men royally screw up.

When checking out someone’s profile, you don’t want to seem creepy.

In this part, I’ll give you some tips to get her attention the proper way.

First things first. Don’t be one of these guys:

Most men hop on the nice guy train. With a single ticket towards the friendzone. (Here’s an article on how you escape the friendzone btw.)

With so many people going this way, you’d think the nice-guy train is cheap. But it isn’t.

You pay a hefty price: Attractiveness. How much? Usually all of it.

If you’re not some Instagram celebrity, which you aren’t since you’re reading this guide, then complimenting her photo comes at the expense of all your attractiveness.

Holy Tip:

Hold onto compliments about her appearance for when you know each other better.

Complimenting her looks right away makes you ‘one of those guys’.

And with ‘those guys’ I mean the endless horde of chanceless men trying to swoon women with sweet talk.

Instead, like a photo that doesn’t revolve around her appearance.

Do you like to hike and see a photo of her rocking hiking boots in the outdoors? Bingo. You got your entry.

See a cute kitty on her Gram and you’re a firm believer that cats > dogs? Like it.

Group shot with her family? And you’re the type of guy that has ‘Family First’ tatted across his chest? Heart that photo!

I’m sure you get the gist. So let’s go into detail:

  • Should you like new or old photos, or both? Liking more recent pictures is the safe play. Liking pictures further down shows her that you really investigated her whole profile. Which can be charming, but only when she already likes you.
  • How many photos should you like? Two or three. One doesn’t get you noticed and four or more is creepy.
  • Should you just like photos, or leave comments too? Generally, you want to keep your communication hidden in the DMs. She likely won’t enjoy flirting in public for everyone to see. The most common reason for me to leave a comment out in the open is if she hasn’t followed me back and I don’t want to get stuck in ‘message requests’. In that case, I might write something that triggers her to check her DMs.

Step 4: Wait for the perfect moment

There are many good moments to slide into a girl’s DMs. And a couple that are horrible.

What do you think the best time is to reach out? “When nobody else is texting her.” Yes sir, good thinking.

When every dude is flooding her inbox, you’ll likely get lost in the ocean of compliments.

So ask yourself, when are other guys shooting their shot?

Let me help you. It’s when she posts a photo like this:

Every guy on Instagram the same minute:

So… don’t slide her DM’s in the hours after she posts a new, sexy photo.

All she’ll think is that you want to spend one hot night with her, just like 69 other guys.

Same goes for when she posts a sexy Instagram story. Every guy on Instagram the same minute:


Long story short: when it comes to WHEN you slide a woman’s DM… do it at any time that she hasn’t recently reminded the whole world how cute she is.

If she posted a photo or story about something you care about, know a lot about, or can relate to… that not everyone will text her about… then text her about that instead.

Step 5: Slide into her DMs!

It’s finally time to actually slide.

Now imagine you executed all previous steps… and then throw all your effort in the trash like this:

This DM slide is so horrible that we can distill a few rules from it.

  1. No compliments on her appearance (you already knew this!).
  2. No Peasant openers (hey, hi, hello, how are you, how’s your day, …).
  3. Don’t try so hard.
  4. No smileys faces and other common emojis (this is a general texting rule btw).
  5. I can’t extract a 5th rule out of this screenshot, but I refuse to have an even amount of bullets.

If you’ve read my articles before, then most of these rules aren’t new to you. But still, we have to zoom in on Rule #3.

Stop trying so hard to be cool.

Let’s return to what the last guy sent to one of my female friends.

I found your profile on Tinder, but I chose not to contact you there because it’s so predictable

No woman on earth believes that particular DM slide. You didn’t text her on Tinder because that’s too predictable? You couldn’t text her on Tinder because she didn’t like your profile.

Holy Tip:

Don’t get forced to slide DMs of hot Tinder girls who didn’t match you.

Upgrade your Tinder profile with my free profile checklist and get all the hot matches you want.

If you thought that this guy was a special case, think again.

A considerable percentage of guys in online dating share the same belief. Namely, that girls can’t see through your bullshit.

A friend of mine got me into using Tinder, which I honestly thought was stupid but I gave it a try and I saw you.

What’s with the seemingly universal need to justify being on Tinder? Everyone and their mom is on Tinder.

Half of the people you know met their partners on Tinder or another dating app. Man, I’m having hella fun on these apps. Own it!

And just be honest.

Here’s what I tell my clients to do: Tell her exactly what happened and what you feel, without trying to be cool. (And without forgetting the rules of attraction, obviously.)

You might just be the first guy in her inbox that gets a reply.

Now I know you’re not going to be happy without getting an actual copy-pastable line here…

And I get it, I’ve been warming you up the whole damned article.

In general, my Clickbait Opener works wonders on Instagram.

It’s a copy-pastable line that generates so much intrigue that she has to text back. Then you’ll follow it up with a personalized statement.

Sounds vague still? No worries, I added a free video that shows you exactly how I use the clickbait opener.

I’ll send it to you for free along with the video and examples if you click here.

Texting on Tinder and Instagram is almost identical. So check out my next Tinder texting guide to get her on a date.

Follow this perfectly executed DM slide example

This, my dearest of readers, is how it’s done. Buckle up, watch, and learn.

My student, let’s call him David, spots his dream girl. He already has an attractive profile, so he follows her and she follows him back.

Next, David is looking to leave a comment on her profile. But not just any comment. He’s on the search for something they both have in common.

After a few days, she posts this story:

If you’re not super familiar with Instagram, let me explain what you’re seeing.

It’s his crush posting a screenshot of her own Instagram feed. The overview of her profile.

Why does she do this? It’s just something people on Instagram do. When they have a new post, they announce it in their story as well to gain more views/likes on the new post.

Yup, people really like validation. Anyway, she circled her latest post and added the text: “SLYTHERIN STARTED PACK”

That must have given David a massive hard-on. Because he used to be the most active poster on a Harry Potter fan forum.

So, dear David goes to her photo, where the caption reads:

So David replies:


A clever comment sticking to the Harry Potter theme. And… She replies. In a playful way even.

He got her attention. So now he knows it’s time to slide into her DMs.


One-upping her Slytherin-style outfit with his very own.


She disses him.

Something that every texting newbie would see as a bad thing, but is in fact a sign that she is interested.

And just like that, a fun conversation started. David kept the conversation going and eventually landed a date.

Congratulations, David.

Keep the conversation going after you slide DMs

Here’s another gift. Kick back in your seat. Throw your feet up if you feel like it.

Anyway, once you’ve successfully slid her DMs, you need to keep the conversation going.

But I figure you’ve already read enough. So just watch this video where I show you how.

Protip: put the playback speed on 1.25 or 1.5 to save time and still understand everything.

How to get her to slide into your DMs

It all revolves around creating attractive Instagram stories.

Nope, these stories don’t need to involve exotic holidays and other expensive things. If it’s fun, it’ll likely work.

Using my method, you can literally make cool stories EVERY day.

Want an example?

How about 6 examples?!

Alright alright let’s go.

There you go.

You now know how to slide into DMs

Do just as I said and invite me to your wedding.

Louis Farfields

And don't forget your download below ;)

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