11 Tips to start a conversation on Tinder (+16 screenshots)

Are you sometimes unsure what to text?

No worries.

I’m about to tell how to start a Tinder conversation that ends with exchanging numbers. Plus, add a date to you calendar.

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The 5 best ways to start a conversation on Tinder

If you want to date fun women, you need to make her excited to meet you by using nothing but texts.

Which is difficult if you’re the type of person who’s more charismatic in person.

That’s why I want to make it easy for you.

Just use my 5 best methods to start your Tinder conversation and she’ll instantly like you more than her other matches.

Discover all about it in my next video.

1. Be different

Almost everyone has made this mistake. You sent “hey” or one of its other boring buddies.

It’s undoubtedly worked a few times for you. But you’ve no doubt been ignored more often than not.

Why does being polite work so poorly?

Because it’s something she’s seen at least 1.3 zillion times before.

To make it worse, these conversations probably went nowhere. So sending her a ‘hello’ will probably instantly get you labeled as a bore.

That’s why you need to stand out and send something different.

  • “I don’t know why. But you seem like the type of girl who’s smart, but who will also lose her glasses only to find out that they were on her head all along”.

Important: Quickly letting you know I found the best opener EVER. Its psychologically irresistible to ignore. I made a video explaining how to use it and it's 'clickbait-principle' with screenshot examples. Check it out here.

Did you check out the screenshot of the day yet? Daily screenshot

Learn from the funniest, flirtiest and best conversations of our coaches.

Check it out now!

2. Keep the compliments for another time

The following is something my female friends often complain about.

Let me paraphrase this opener for you:

“I’m so sorry,
I’m trying to be funny
But I don’t realize
That I have the self-image
of a piece of used
toilet paper…”

You NEVER start a conversation by complimenting her looks. You swiped her right on Tinder, which already confirms you like the way she looks.

By repeating it you’re saying nothing more than “I usually don’t talk to someone as good-looking as you. I’m so fūcking excited!”

Humor is welcomed in your opener. I advise you to be playful. But if you do, then do it well.

Like so, if she has a doggo.

  • “O my gawddddd. You’re so cute! And your owner isn’t too bad looking either. Could use some more fur though”.


You’ll notice there’s quite a number of girls posing with mister Doggelson.

Which is good news for you, my dearest Tinderfriend, because you will be super-efficient in starting chats with them. And save yourself some good ol’ time.

3. Tone down the self-deprecation

Alright, my dearest reader, if there’s one thing that really upsets my stomach, it’s guys with no self-respect.

That, and my own cooking.

Lo and behold:

First of all, I’d like to apologize for my fellow Tinder coaches on the internet. The above line is a direct copy from another ‘dating coach’, who clearly hasn’t been on a date since 2009.

What makes it so bad?

  • The heart-eye emojis show you’re far too excited.
  • Calling yourself a mistake is incredibly unattractive.
  • You’re already suggesting that you want to boink her.

Here’s a more confident alternative you can experiment with.

  • “I usually don’t say this. But you have excellent taste in men. Is it that obvious from my photos that I’m a Disney princess?”

4. Stay away from anything raunchy

Yes, it’s true.

As a man, you want to be clear in your intentions. ASAP.

When I coach clients in real life, I always tell my students that if the woman they approached doesn’t know why he’s talking to her… they’ll get a spanking.

But just because you want to be clear in your intent, doesn’t mean you do this.

Asking some for sex and fried chicken in the first message, never works. Unless if you’re talking to me. I never say no to fried chicken.

Do you want to get a bit flirty? Keep it light.

  • No fuggin way that you’re into Son Little. It almost makes me want to passionately hold hands with you. Almost”.

Obviously, replace ‘Son Little’ with any other niche artist that you like.

5. Mention her camera angles

If you pay attention to girls’ profiles, you’ll start to see patterns.

And I look at every little detail with the focus of a mufukkin’ LASER.

Here’s one thing you’ll likely notice.

Women tend to take selfies from the same angle, ALL THE TIME.

They each have their own tricks to look as stunning as possible in a photo. Nothing wrong with that, who doesn’t like looking good in a pic?

So how do you use this to your advantage?

By playfully calling her out on it.

  • “I see you have a ‘best side’ for selfies. I was wondering what’s on the other side of your face though. Got any cool face tattoos there?”

With this conversation starter you’re hitting a couple of boxes at the same time:

  • You show that you’ve had a good look at her profile, unlike most men.
  • You have humor.
  • You make it easy for her to respond.

6. Ignore her sexy selfies

Some women are beautiful. Some women are slightly less beautiful.

And some women make you want to rip off their clothes and spread more seed than a farmer in harvesting season.

These women obviously know they look smoking hot.

So they’ll show it off.

Nice… But how can you start a Tinder conversation with her?

I’m not sure how your testosterone levels are, bro. But when I see such things, my brain can only think about one thing.

And they very much know this.

Because 9/10 dudes are starting the convo by mentioning something about her breasticles.

And that’s great news for you!

Because this means it’s super duper easy for you to stand out.

Just don’t talk about her body!


Here’s what I sent to my match who had this photo in her profile:


“Did you know round mirrors are found to make you look wider compared to rectangle mirrors?”


  • Funny.
  • Original.
  • It’s not about her body.

What would you send to the next woman as your icebreaker?

I’d probably talk about two things: the name of the flower, and that I always used to buy that specific flower for my grandma. And that she still has to clean up yesterday’s wine glasses.

And what about the next lady?

I’d mention that her gel nails are done very well. And that she’s not holding her cava glass according to the rules of etiquette.

And to the first girl in the tank top, I’d probably say: “The tiling is done very nicely. True craftsmanship.”

By not falling for the “bait” that is her stunning body, you show her that you are in control of your manly brain.

And on a deeper level it shows that you’re not blown away by such features. You’ve been there a couple times before.

Make sense? Awesome.

Holy Tip:

Once you’re talking to her on Tinder, the next challenge is how to keep the conversation going on Tinder.

Luckily for you, I wrote a separate article about that.

You can find out how to keep the convo moving towards the date here (includes 15 screenshot examples).

8. Stick to lines that she hasn’t heard before

One of the best ways to start a conversation, is with humor.

As the legendary heartbreaker once said:

“If you can make a woman laugh, you can make her do anything”
—Darkwing Duck

Now I know you can’t come up with something funny every single time. And you’ve got other stuff to do than think of witty Tinder openers.

So what does the average Joe do?

He Googles, “hilarious pickup lines that always work”. And once upon a time they may have worked.

But by now, all these lines have been floating around the net for a while. And Joe wasn’t the only guy googling them.

Do you still start conversations with “Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?”…

…then you can just as well hit the three dots and then press unmatch.

The result will be the same.

The only thing you’re communicating with these rehashed lines, is that you’re copy-pasting.

And if you put in no effort, she won’t either.

Use pickup lines that AREN’T popular yet.

This is exactly the reason why I keep my best lines locked away for my subscribers. That way, not every clown can find them.

Here you can find the free 10 Texts That Always Work.

Download them now so you always have something witty to text her.

9. Get her to start the conversation on Tinder

With the next technique, you’ll often get her to send you the first text. And sometimes even get Super Likes.

I’m going to be honest with you, getting Super Likes probably won’t happen often.

Women generally like to be the ones being seduced.


this is the best way to increase the odds of getting Super Likes and first texts. If you do it right, you can expect to get the first texts from her about 50% of the time.


In one of two ways.

Firstly, by optimizing your photos.

The photo with the teddies she’s talking about, is a bit of a whack picture. Exactly why it’s on my profile. It’s one of those hate-it-or-love-it things.

But it’s definitely a photo that makes her feel something.

And that’s always your #1 goal.

Secondly, by writing a clever Tinder ‘about me’ text.

Something that triggers her interest, that is also easy to reply to.

My current profile text baits out so many reactions that I pretty much have to do nothing myself anymore.

If you’re not aware yet of HOW to write such a funny Tinder bio, then read the article about it down below. That’s where I explain in great detail which photos work and which ones don’t. And WHY.

I’ll also show you which bios provoke most reactions. With fresh examples.

One thing you need to know when girls open YOU… is that you are on a different game plan now.

No need to act all whacky anymore. She’s already shown good interest. All you need to be doing is not fucking it up.

Safely cruise to the finish. AKA the date.

10. Use the personalized opener (best way to start a conversation on Tinder)

I’m now going to give you the best way to start a conversation on Tinder.

The icing on the cake, the cherry on top, the crème de la crème. It’s not for everyone though. If you’re extremely lazy, then this might not be your jam.

This way of starting a Tinder conversation takes a little more effort.

It’s my Personalized Opener.

Here’s how you do it in three simple steps:

  1. You thoroughly look at her profile.
  2. You choose one thing that stands out to you.
  3. You start a Tinder conversation about this thing.

Let’s make this as clear as possible with an example.

Imagine swiping when you stumble upon this profile:

Damn, she’s cute. Let’s not fuck this one up.

What stands out to me are: the gorgeous building in the background, her all-black outfit, the hanging plants, and her ‘fedora’ profile text.

I was a big fan of her bio.

But that doesn’t mean I’m going to say something like: “Hey, I like the joke in your profile text”

It just shows some appreciation. Without bringing anything else to the table.


That’s why I added some humor and teasing.

Her reaction is pretty sweet. So I shoot her a text back with some more of the same humor.

Let’s practice some more.

You’re Tindering again and BANG, you match this sporty spice:

She chose to connect her Instagram to her Tinder. As you can see, this photo isn’t one of the pictures she selected for her Tinder profile. It’s one of her Instagram uploads.

But something about it stood out to me, and it wasn’t just her badonkadonk.

See the next screenshot for what I came up with.

Bang! That wasn’t all that hard, was it?

We just started two conversations with beautiful women on Tinder.

This type of conversation starter works for my students, and it will work for you too.

And in the next tip, I have something for you to help you out even more.

11. Have fun

Experiment away.

Trial and error.

Find out what works for YOU and what doesn’t.

To help you out I’m giving you my Tinder Toolkit just below. Yes, for free.

Inside are you find 10 good Tinder lines, my Profile Checklist, and the #1 Tinder opener.

You’ll never need to wonder how to start a Tinder conversation anymore.

Good luck, brother.

Louis Farfields


And don't forget your download below ;)

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