∨ Browse categories
Tinder How does tinder work Tinder Conversation tips Tinder hook-ups Tinder locations Tinder opening Tinder profile Tinder subscriptions Misc General online dating tips Dry texting How to keep the conversation going How to text your crush Opening Texting tips Bumble Hinge Dating Apps Misc

11 Tips to start a conversation on Tinder (+16 screenshots)

Are you sometimes unsure what to text?

You’re doubtful about every message and you keep praying she’ll react.

You don’t know how to start a Tinder conversation.

After reading this article you’ll know exactly how to start a Tinder conversation and make the other crazy about you.

Louis - The TextGod
Yo, Louis here. Quickly letting you know I found the best opener EVER. Its psychologically irresistible to ignore. I made a video explaining how to use it and it's 'clickbait-principle' with screenshot examples. Check it out here.

The best ways to start a conversation on Tinder

So you have a hot Tinder match. But Before your match even thinks about meeting up and doing dirty things with u, there’s something you need to do…

You need to press the right emotional buttons and make her attracted with just words. Because that’s all you get on Tinder.

Say one wrong word and she’s gone.

Talk too much and she’s gone.

And worst of all, even when you say nothing at all… she’s gone.

You have to talk to her, but you have to say exactly the right thing if you want to stand a chance.

Before we dive into all the tips, watch this special video I made for you.

You’ll get my 5 best proven and tested ways to start your Tinder conversation:


1. Don’t be ordinary

Here’s the first way you DON’T start a conversation on Tinder:

You’ve definitely sent this yourself sometimes.

The good old “hey” or some other greeting.

And I know, you’ve also received a response to this sometimes, but more often than not, you got blatantly ignored.

And unless you’re the submissive type that enjoys getting dominated hardcore, or enjoys being ignored, it’s best you stop using this greeting.

Because if you do… well then “you not get a reply :(“

It’s the text that gets sent by people who can’t think of anything.

2. Don’t be a kiss ass

The following is something my female friends often complain about.

Let me paraphrase this opener for you:

“I’m so sorry,
I’m trying to be funny
But I don’t realize
That I have the self-image
of a piece of used
toilet paper…”

You NEVER start a conversation by complimenting her looks.

You swiped her right on Tinder, which already confirms you like the way she looks.

By repeating it you’re saying nothing more than “I usually don’t talk to someone as good-looking as you. I’m so fūcking excited!”

Humor is welcomed in your opener. I advise you to. But if you do, then do it well. More on that later.

To conclude this tip, I have an equally terrible text example for:

No, Jacques, you can’t. Now GTFO.

3. Don’t show a lack of self worth

Alright, my dearest reader, if there’s one thing that really upsets my stomach, it’s guys with no self-respect.

That, and my ex’s cooking.

Lo and behold:

First of all I’d like to apologize for my fellow Tinder coaches on the internet.

I’m afraid this line was copy-pasted from a blog where guys who haven’t been on a date since 2009 give advice.

Let’s break it down and learn from this mistake:

“I’m joking *emoji*… How are you?”

Nope. Unfortunately, he wasn’t joking. The spontaneous row of heart-eye-emojis followed by the “funny” question about being her first mistake this year, say enough.

He doesn’t get why he’s matching with such a goddess and gets overwhelmed by his excitement. But not willing to be that flirty, he paddles back to boring land.

How? By stating he’s joking and asking how she’s doing. One of the most frequently used openers on the dating app.

Now this Tinder conversation officially opens with the worst of three worlds:

  • Being overexcited from the get go
  • Cliché way of flirting
  • Boring questions

But it could be worse… My dearest reader, lower the brightness of your screen because the cringe that’s about to appear on your screen, is not something you want radiating on your precious face too much.

I don’t even want to talk about this or I’ll break my keyboard.

At the same time I hope as many guys as possible read my Tinder tips, so I can help them out.


4. Don’t be a creeper

Now, since you’re reading this and you’re a man of action, I’ll assume you’ve already done some research. Or that you already know a couple of things about seduction and dating.

If my assumption is correct, then you already know that, as a man, you should be clear in your intent. ASAP.

When I taught bootcamps I always told my students that if they’re talking to a woman and after 5 minutes she has no clue why they’re talking to her… they’ll get a spanking.

You need to be clear in your intent right from the start. But you need to do this the right way… otherwise you’ll soon be… The Creeper.

Asking some for sex and fried chicken in the first message, never works. Unless if you’re talking to me. I never say no to fried chicken.

And I admit, I giggled a little at this guy’s choice of words and the juicy combo of fried chicken and coitus, but learn your lesson:

No sexual messages in the beginning of the Tinder conversation.

5. Use her pet to your advantage

Often times you’ll see a picture of her with a dog, cat or other animal.

This Swedish blonde threw in a duckface next to her dog sticking out its tongue. And you’ll notice there’s quite a number of girls posing with mister Doggelson.

Which is good news for you, my dearest Tinderfriend, because you will be super-efficient in starting chats with them. And save yourself some good ol’ time.

What you’re going to do when you see the combination of woman+dog on your screen, is this:

“Wow you look super cute…”

When she reads this, her interest will dwindle for a couple milliseconds. She’ll classify you as Jacques the Cringelord from earlier in this article. Remember him?

Damned, there he is again. Get the hell out of here, Jacques!

The good part about this opener is that it soon becomes clear that we were talking about her dog, not her. Although she’s gorgeous too!

“And your human is pretty ok too ;)” Bang bang.

Remember that women treat their pets as their children. A compliment on their child is 37 times more powerful than a compliment about herself.

On top of that, a woman never wants someone they can instantly get. She wants someone she’s put effort in. That challenges her. This witty way to initiate the conversation on Tinder is exactly that.

Anyway, girls with pets are easy to open with this line.

6. Mention her camera angles

If you start looking attentively at girls’ profiles, you’ll start to see patterns. And I look at every little detail with the focus of a mufukkin’ LASER.

One thing you’ll notice is that women tend to take their selfies from the same side over and over again.

Moreover, instead of just shooting it from the same side, they’ll snap their selfie from the exact same angle. Camera just above eye level, chin slightly upward so their jawline is popping, lips slightly pouting for extra volume, and so on…

They each have their own tricks to look as stunning as possible in a photo. Nothing wrong with that, who doesn’t like looking good in a pic?

Anyway… This is a good thing. Because it’s your ticket out of TinderLoserLand where all boys live that get ignored match after match.

What you’ll text her is something like this:

“I see you have a ‘best side’ for selfies. I was wondering what’s on the other side of your face though. Got any cool face tattoos there?’

With this conversation starter you’re hitting a couple of boxes at the same time:

  • You show that you’ve had a good look at her profile, unlike most men.
  • You have humor.
  • You make it easy for her to respond.

7. Ignore her sexy selfies and stand out from the croud

Some women have a beautiful body and face. Some women have a slightly less beautiful body.

And some women have the type of body that makes you unable to think of anything else than tearing off her clothes and burning a couple of thousand calories with her.

Every now and then you’ll run into a girl that knows the power of her curves. And she also knows how many matches she can score with them.

So you come across her bland profile… and it’s just a selfie or photo of themselves…

Nice… But how can you start a Tinder conversation with her? Like these 3 ladies I matched in Sweden:

I’m not sure how your testosterone levels are, bro. But my brain doesn’t feel like thinking about much when it sees such photos.

It just thinking about different ways to burn thousands of calories again. And these ladies know that.

So what do you text her to begin the conversation on Tinder? Well, let’s first start to understand their situation…

They’re already getting matches by the ton with these photos. And what do you think most men are texting them?

Will it be something about travel, movies, and Sunday’s breakfast?


Curves, boobs, ass, booty, melons, breasticles, and all of that stuff.

That’s what those guys will talk about. Because their brains too, can’t think of much else anymore.

And if you’ve paid close attention then you already know what happens next. One by one they turn into… The Creeper

And women don’t like The Creeper. The lady in the screenshot below is no exception:

She took out her bodypic because men kept obsessing over her (next level) curves. Which might be even more annoying than repeatedly getting “hey” as first text.

And again, this is good news. Because this is how you will score, my dearest friend. You are that one guy that has enough self control to talk about something other than her heavenly appearance.

Now I can already hear you thinking:

“But Louis, what do I tell her then?”

Good question. Take this girl for example:

You are NOT allowed to talk about her curves.

Here’s what you ARE allowed to talk about:

  • Her handbag
  • The wall
  • The mirror
  • The lamp
  • The other lamp

Or any other detail you see in the photo.

Here’s how I did it:

“Did you know round mirrors are found to make you look wider compared to rectangle mirrors?”


  • Funny
  • Original
  • It’s not about her body

A relief to her, and a good start to a Tinder conversation to you.

Want some more examples of what you could say? If you look back at the other Swedish ladies from the screenshots, you could say:

Lady 1

  • The name of the flower, and that you always used to buy that specific flower for your grandma.
  • She still has to clean up yesterday’s wine glasses

Lady 2

  • That her gel nails are done very well
  • She’s not holding her cava glass according to the rules of the etiquette

Lady 3

  • The tiling is done very nicely. True craftsmanship.
  • That she’s someone that probably always goes for full black outfits

By not falling for the “bait” that is her stunning body, you show her that you are in control of your manly brain.

And on a deeper level it shows that you’re not blown away by such features. You’ve been there a couple times before.

Makes sense? Awesome.

Holy Tip:

Once you’re talking to her on Tinder, the next challenge is how to keep the conversation going on Tinder.

Luckily for you a wrote a seperate article about that.

Praise the TextGod later.

8. Use great pick-up lines that aren’t overused yet

One of the best ways to start a conversation, is with humor.

As the legendary heartbreaker once said:

“If you can make a woman laugh, you can make her do anything”
—Darkwing duck

Now I know you can’t come up with something funny every single time. And you’ve got other stuff to do than think of witty Tinder openers.

So what does the average Joe do?

He googles pickup lines. “hilarious” pickup lines “that always work”. And maybe once upon a time they did work.

But by now all these lines have been floating around the net for a while. And Joe wasn’t the only guy googling them.

If today you still start a conversation with “did it hurt when you fell from heaven?”… then you can just as well hit the three dots and then press unmatch. The result will be the same.

The only think you’re communicating with these rehashed lines, is that you’re copy pasting.

And she sees that as well. Contrary to popular belief, women aren’t stupid. So what happens when you show up with your copy pasted openers from the 60’s? You get a sloppy reply, or no reply at all.

“You get what you give.”

The solution? Tinder pickup lines that AREN’T known yet…

Holy Tip:

I’m very proud of the lines I put out there.

They are copy pastable for anyone to use.

The best ones I keep locked away for my subscribers, so they aren’t used by any clown.

Here you can find the free 10 Texts That Always Work.

Download them now so you always have something witty to text her.

9. Trigger her to start the conversation on Tinder

Alrighty, you now know how a Tinder conversation starts… but there’s something better.

What if could make HER start the conversation with you? While YOU are the one to lean back in his chair?

Having girls superliking you, and then shooting the first text? It sounds like a myth to most men.

This is the best way to go about this… And I’m honest with you bro, it doesn’t happen often.

But you can greatly increase your odds. And it will make Tinder texting much easier.

How? By optimizing your photos for example.

The photo with the teddies she’s talking about, is a bit of a whack picture. Exactly why it’s on my profile. It’s one of those hate it or love it things.

But it’s definitely a photo that makes her feel something. And that’s always what you strive for.

You can also have her begin the conversation by writing a clever Tinder ‘about me’ text.

If you write your bio in such way that it provokes interest while being easy to react to… then you’ll see that many women will bite.

My current profile text baits out so many reactions that I pretty much have to do nothing myself anymore.

If you’re not aware yet of HOW to write such a funny Tinder bio, then read the article about it. That’s where I explain in great detail which photos work and which ones don’t. And WHY.

I’ll also show you which bios provoke most reactions. With fresh examples.

One thing you need to know when girls open YOU… is that you are on a different game plan now.

No need to act all whacky anymore. She’s already shown good interest. All you need to be doing is not fucking it up.

Safely cruise to the finish. AKA the date.

10. Use the personalized opener (Best way to start a conversation on Tinder)

I’m now going to give you the best way to start a conversation on Tinder.

The icing on the cake, the cherry on top, the crème de la crème. It’s not for everyone though. If you’re extremely lazy, then this might not be your jam.

This way of starting a Tinder conversation takes a little more effort.

It’s my Personalized Opener.

Here’s how you do it in three simple steps:

  1. You thoroughly look at her profile.
  2. You choose one thing that stands out to you
  3. You start a Tinder conversation about this thing

Let’s make this as clear as possible with an example.

Imagine swiping when you stumble upon this profile:

Damn, she’s cute. Let’s not fuck this one up.

Step 1: Take a good look at her profile.

There’s always something you can talk about. And the more you do this, the easier it gets.

Step 2: Choose one thing that stands out to you.

You could talk about the gorgeous city she’s in, the building in the background, her all black outfit, the type of plant hanging from the wall, or anything on her other 4 photos.

Or you could say something about her uhm… ‘special’ profile text.

Which really stands out to me, instantly making me think back to this legendary video:

And because she talks about neckbeard, I had to think about those “Brony” guys that are into My Little Pony.:

Step 3: Start a Tinder conversation using this thing.

Now you could say:

“Hey, I like the joke in your profile text”

You would have executed all three steps. And your opener would be better still than the crap most guys bombard her with. But you’re not really blowing her mind with that quick observation.

Let’s say her princess parts won’t be tingling just yet. So we’re going to add one or two extra ingredients: Humor and/or Teasing.

Her reaction is pretty sweet. So I shoot her a text back with some more of the same humor. Inspired by this classic meme:

Alright. Enough niche memes for now.

Let’s make sure you know how to start a tinder conversation with the Personalized Opener.

You’re Tindering again and BANG, you match this sporty spice:

She chose to connect her Instagram to her Tinder. As you can see, this photo isn’t one of the pictures she selected for her Tinder profile. It’s one of her Instagram uploads.

Are you ready? Let’s go!

Step 1: Take a good look at her profile.

This one would be a bit tricky to most men. But not to you.

Remember what we talked about earlier in this article? Don’t fall for her bait and comment on her curves.

Step 2: Choose one thing that stands out to you.

Not the booty, as appealing as it may be. I spot something we can work with. And it’s something that instantly allows us to work in some humor and teasing.

Step 3: Start a Tinder conversation using this thing

Bang! That wasn’t all that hard, was it?

We just started two conversations with beautiful women on Tinder.

This type of conversation starter works for my students, and it will work for you too.

And in the next tip, I have something for you to help you out even more.

11. Make Alexander Bell proud

Alexander who?

Alexander Bell.

The guy that invented the first practical telephone.

I want you to continue his work.

Not by inventing all sorts of next-level technology, but with Tinder stuff.

Experiment away.

Trial and error.

Find out what works for YOU and what doesn’t.

To help you out I’m giving you my Tinder Toolkit just below. Yes, for free.

Inside are you find 10 good Tinder lines, my Profile Checklist, and the #1 Tinder opener.

You’ll never need to wonder how to start a Tinder conversation anymore.

Good luck, brother.

Louis Farfields


For more tips, check out these articles:

And don't forget your download below ;)

FREE download (must-have):
My secret clickbait-opener

Do you know what's strangly irresistible, even in texting? The psychological principle of clickbait!

And you can wield this power with my Clickbait opener to get quick replies.
You get 7 examples + 2 follow-up lines here:

Yes, give me the free opener!

Related articles


Write a comment

Welkom! Deze website maakt gebruik van cookies

De noodzakelijke en statistiek-cookies verzamelen geen persoonsgegevens en helpen ons de site te verbeteren. Daarnaast gebruiken we andere cookies voor promotie en het testen van nieuwe functionaliteiten. Hieronder kan je aangeven of je dat goed vindt (meer info: Privacy Policy)