There’s a woman you like, but you haven’t talked in a while. And now you’re wondering how to get back in touch, but you’re not sure how.
Because you’re about to get the best texts to send to a girl you haven’t talked to in a while that will make her excited to reconnect with you.In this article:More...
What to expect after a long period of not talking
If you haven’t talked to her in a while, it’s normal to be a bit anxious about reaching out. They might be upset at you for letting the connection wither, or they could have moved on.
Don’t let pride or the risk of awkwardness get in the way of saying hi.
In fact, don’t be focused on yourself at all. If you want to make the odds of reviving your bond as big as possible, it’s best if you focus on them.
If your texts are brimming with carefree positivity, she most likely will be happy to hear from you and text back.
Do keep in mind that your relationship may not return back to normal. Either because she’s changed, she’s too busy, or she’s simply not interested.
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Is it smart to try to reconnect with someone from the past?
If you’re unsure whether or not to rekindle an old relationship, it’s important to examine why things fizzled out.
Explosive endings clearly demand you think things through more deliberately. If it ended in an unresolvable conflict, you have to first figure out if you’re even supposed to be in each other’s lives. Did you have a healthy relationship or did you simply share some good times?
And if you think you’re good for each other, consider how you’ll prevent things from going sour again.
Did you change as a person? Did your circumstances change? Or have things changed on their side?
Next, you want to honestly ask yourself why you want to reinitiate contact with them. Are you feeling lonely and sad? Then you might be motivated by the wrong reasons.
If your desire to get in touch comes from a good place, the relationship will likely be much more enriching.
What to text a long-lost acquaintance
Your message will be wildly different depending on the kind of relationship the two of you shared. What does your history look like? Did you spend a few nights together, were you inseparable for months, or were you close friends for years that drifted apart?
The details greatly influence your message. Although nothing impacts your text more than a bad ending.
If you didn’t split ways on good terms, you need to address the situation. Gloss over the conflict and it’ll seem like you don’t really understand or care about what happened.
Convo starting texts for someone you dated
She didn’t text back after the date
If you’ve only gone on one or two dates, you don’t want to send anything too serious. In fact, it’s usually best if you keep it light and positive.
So you can go with a fun meme.
It’s playful and non-needy. Something that’s impossible to rub her the wrong way.
Another good option is to send her something warm and attentive.
- “This TikTok totally reminded me of you lol”.
- “Remind me of that book you were talking about. You got me curious ;)”.
- “You know what was my favorite part of our last hang out?”
- “I just saw something that made me think of you. I hope you’re doing well”.
You hurt her feelings
If you really upset her, getting into her good books might be a terrible idea.
So think back to what she said she needed. Was it space? Then give her a week if you only just started dating, or 30+ days if you were getting pretty serious.
Did she not want to hear from you again? Then you want to let her be and give her the chance to move on.
If you hurt her feelings, be sure to do what she needs, not what you need.
With the warnings out of the way, here are some texts she’d like if she’s ready to hear from you.
- “I know things ended a little crazily, but I know how you get the winter blues sometimes. So I just wanted to see if you were okay :)”.
- “You may not want to hear from me, but I came across this art exhibition that I know you’ll love. You should check it out if you have the time”.
- “No need to respond to any of this, but despite how I may have made you feel, I just want you to know that you’re a great person who’s worthy of love and wonderful things. Sorry if I ever made you feel otherwise”.
For more about reaching out to an ex or old flame, check out this article:
Texts for a former crush you’ve lost touch with
If you haven’t ever dated, there’s a good chance you’re already in the friendzone or on the way there. So you generally want to avoid texts that cement the idea you’re ‘just a friend’.
The next texts are both silly and suggestive. A great mix. Going platonic is also fine, as long as you make it flirty ASAP.
- “We haven’t talked in a while, so I thought I’d give you an excuse to reach out to me ;).”
- “Been a while since we talked. Did you already get my name tattooed on your butt? ;)”
- “So what are you getting for me on Valentine’s Day? Also, how are you doing? :)”.
For more lines to text a girl you like, check out my next 3-minute video:
Someone you lost touch with who’s probably eager to hear from you
1. Wish her a happy holiday
If you haven’t talked to a girl in a LONG while, the holidays are a great way to get back in touch.
Be it Christmas, Easter, Ramadan, Thanksgiving, or any celebration you know she cherishes.
Sending her heartfelt message wishing good in the celebration is a great way to get to talking terms with her without looking needy, desperate, or suspicious.
- “May your Halloween be spooktacular and full of wicked fun!”
2. Use a bad situation as your excuse
Stockmarket crashes, locust invasions, people buying toilet paper to save themselves from a global pandemic…
…the world gets crazy pretty regularly.
So use these bad situations as an excuse to reach out to people you haven’t talked to in a while:
- “Times have been really crazy lately and I just wanted to make sure you’re OK”.
3. Look at her Instagram
Another chill way to reconnect is to react to her Instagram story. If one of her recent posts or stories catches your eye, use it as your in to get a convo going.
- “Those brownies on your Insta look yum! How come you’ve never made any for me? ;(((“
By the way, why don’t you keep track of my Instagram while you’re at it. Then you can see how a TextGod uses IG:
4. Wish her a happy birthday
Everyone enjoys getting birthday wishes. It makes us feel special. Women probably doubly so.
Because it’s low investment and highly stimulating, it’s probably the best way to reach out to a girl you haven’t talked to in a long time.
It’s actually how I re-initiated a convo with a girl whom I hadn’t spoken to in 9 months!
- “Congrats on completing another circle around the Sun!”
5. Make it about her
The longer you haven’t talked to a girl, the more important it is to give value.
That’s because relationships work a bit like a bank account. If you see each other regularly and share good times, your balance will be high. But if you stop seeing each other for a long time, your funds will be dried up.
Making any withdrawals impossible.
So you want to send her a text that grows the emotional bank account.
Here’s some inspiration.
- “Just saw a girl walk down the street in a bunny costume who looked oddly like you. Sure you’re not in [wherever are you saw the bunny]? ;)”
- “Just started reading a book that totally made me think of you. How are you???? <3”
- “[Shared friend] just told me you bought your first house. Congratulations! I hope everything is going well with you. :)”
6. Be honest
Women People love honesty. Especially when your honesty puts you in a vulnerable position. It shows confidence and emotional depth.
So just say why you’re texting her.
- “Just saw a sale on your favorite sour candies and bought some. How are you? If you’re quick to reply I may still have some for you. ;)”
- “Hey, I just walked by the park we’d also walk through and I had to think of you. Have you been behaving? 👮”
If she’s been a bad girl, be sure to drop a few cop car emojis in your next text.
7. Tap into your shared history
Simply think back to the last time you hung out in real life or via a video call.
What did you guys talk about? Travel plans? Exercise? Food? My Little Pony?
Suppose you were talking about her latest Netflix obsession. An great text could look something like this:
- “Only 20 minutes into the first episode and I already hate [insert character]. Haha no but seriously, just saw this show pop up in my feed and had to think of you. How are things?”
- “[photo of a memorable hang out] How fun was this day? Can’t believe it’s been so long already!”
Texting a girl you haven’t talked to in YEARS
If you know each other from WAY back but haven’t talked to each other in years, it gets a little tricky.
Firstly, you’ve both probably changed a whole lot and are living very different lives. Secondly, you have a long history together that I know little about.
Did you used to date? Were you platonic besties? Or was she someone you had a crush on but never had the guts to ask out?
These intricacies can make a big difference in how you want to reach out.
I’ve got two ideas for you.
Firstly, if you were REALLY tight, send her a handwritten letter. Don’t write a book, keep it short and let the special nature of a handwritten letter do the work.
If you think is a little too much, or you don’t know their address, send her something like this:
- “I know it’s been forever, but I was just thinking of the great times we used to have and I just hope you’re doing well. You’re a wonderful person and you deserve it :)”.
With these 20+ texts you can almost get any girl to reply. But that’s not all you need to rebuild your connection.
Once the conversation gets going, you need to keep it going and lead it to the date. At least, if you have any naughty thoughts you want to satisfy.
Easier said than done, unless you have my 10 Texts That Always Work.
Whether it’s a funny answer, a flirty text to raise the vibes or a non-needy way to ask her out.
And while you’re at it, you can grab my most powerful texting technique of all, The Personality Slice. I explain it all in a video.
And don't forget your download below ;)