New and lost when it comes to online dating?
Perhaps you’re a veteran who doesn’t have the success he deserves.
You’re in the right place.
Because in this article you’ll get 11 online dating tips for men.
- How to get a woman so excited she hops onto a train (+ SCREENSHOTS)
- Become more attractive with an embarrassingly simple trick
- A technique that gets her addicted to your texts
- How I got a girl begging for my attention (+ SCREENSHOTS)
- The 3 steps to an irresistible photo
- The #1 dating tip that almost everyone gets wrong
- And much more…
By the way, do you sometimes get stuck in online conversations? Very frustrating... but there is a simple solution. I created a bonus named The 10 Texts That Always Work, including my favorite text to send when I have gotten her number, an easy message to get her out on a date, and some witty lines to get the conversation going. Download it, it's completely free and easy to use.
Also an avid YouTube watcher?
Here you’ll find my video with science-backed tips about online dating.
Watch it now:
#1: Online dating tips → How to get her attracted to you
There’s a secret to seducing women, and it doesn’t involve being a tough guy who jumps off 220 meters (720 feet) dams.
That sounds like something out of a movie.
You know, that one where a guy shoots swarms of bad guys and penetrates even more beautiful women?
He looks like this:
Huh, wait… wrong photo.
That’s TextGod coach Dan.
He doesn’t even own a gun and he can barely penetrate the wraps of his Christmas presents. (Actually, Dan is the most successful dating coach in the Benelux. And that photo is him being interviewed on TV.)
I am of course talking about James Bond.
The man, the legend.
As you undoubtedly know, James Bond is an icon.
- He never loses his cool
- He overcomes all threats to his life, no matter how dangerous
- And he saves the world, while sexing the most beautiful women on the planet
James is a great role model…
If you live in a fantasy world.
007 is a fictional character who couldn’t ever be real.
Real men, like you and me, have flaws.
This could obviously never happen in a Bond movie.
Continue to the next online dating tip and see how your flaws can get you laid.
#2: Online dating tips → Flaws are your best wingman
Get girls so excited with your texts that she jumps on the train to see you.
Most men who come to me for advice, want to know how to seem more awesome.
But that flies in the face of my two most important values:
- Nothing is more unattractive than someone who tries too hard
- Women aren’t dumb
Your Tinder match KNOWS you have flaws.
And if you don’t dare show them, what does that say?
It says that you’re not comfortable with your flaws. That you’re insecure.
When it comes to sniffing out your insecurities, women are bloodhounds.
Your match when you hide your insecurities behind bravado.
There’s no better way to prove my case than with an example.
It doesn’t happen often, but even the TextGod goofs sometimes.
And when I goof, I don’t hide it.
My blunder is obvious to me, but maybe not to you.
So let’s put my screenshot under the microscope.
The conversation was going okay.
Better, after I made the ‘mandatory 00:00 makeout’-joke. As you can see by her emoji and question.
But then I talked too big:
- Labeling women with numbers is pretty shallow and degrading.
- I’m basically saying I’m a 10+.
Two major turn offs.
And as you can see, she didn’t feel the need to reply anytime soon.
He who tries too hard to be cool, comes across as insecure.
Next time you feel the urge to show off, just say it as it is.
Or play yourself down.
Using my bad text as an example, I was better off saying:
Here’s another texting example where I practice what I preach.
Saying it as it is.
Excuse me for the lack of screenshot, the original is in Dutch. Ielgh…
It takes courage to feel fine being normal.
Which is exactly what I did in the voice message, where I explained how I’m not as cool as I seem on Instagram.
And that’s what impresses and attracts her. Not bragging.
Sharing your flaws and not trying to be cool is only part of the attraction equation.
Modesty doesn’t work unless you have something to be modest about.
I for instance have lots of Instagram followers. So when I call myself a pleb, I’m downplaying my coolness.
But if you have no coolness to play down, modesty isn’t as powerful.
If you have few symbols of coolness (high-status job, pretty girlfriend, attractive body, etc.) you want to actually celebrate the small successes you do have.
Man, I should win the Nobel prize for explaining stuff. (See what I mean?)
Now onto the next tip…
#3: Online dating tips → the truth on bad boys and women
Find out how to have the sexy bad boy qualities women LOVE, while staying yourself.
Hollywood taught us women LOVE bad boys, but that’s only partly true.
Women only love balanced bad boys.
Let me grab a scale.
*reaches into aquarium*
“This may sting a little, fishy.”
Just kidding. I’d never do that to my slippery pal, Gilly.
Here’s what I was looking for:
My badboy scale.
This scale is not only unorthodox, it’s magical.
On the left side of the scale, is your feminine/vulnerable side.
On the right, is your masculine/cool side.
As the scale stands now, your femininity is overpowering your masculinity. (The lower the scale, the greater its impact.)
What happens if you go full-on James Bond-mode?
Then the right side of the scale would drop all the way down and flatten the red box.
That red box is actually a button.
And once you press it, an alarm goes off.
The further you push it, the louder the alarm.
Are you pretending to be James Bond? Then the alarm screams:
🚨🚨🚨 WARNING: This guy is acting super cool in an attempt to hide his insecurities. Do not engage. 🚨🚨🚨
That’s not a message you want your Tinder matches to hear.
So be more honest and vulnerable to tip the scale in the other direction.
Too honest and vulnerable, however, and the scale hits the button on the opposite side.
Now the alarm yells a different message:
🚨🚨🚨 WARNING: This guy is super emotional. He’s probably damaged. Do not engage. 🚨🚨🚨
In order to not ring any alarms, you want to strike a balance between vulnerable and cool.
That balance is the thread that runs through this entire article.
Humor also needs to be balanced.
Continue to find out…
#4: Online dating tips → The right and WORST way to joke
You may think you’re hilarious, but your jokes could be sabotaging your matches RIGHT NOW.
Women love men that can make them laugh.
Nobel prize winner, Jeffrey Hall proved it in his Humor In Courtship study.
His conclusion won’t surprise you, but it’s important all the same:
The more often a man successfully makes a woman laugh, the more likely she’s interested in dating him.
Despite the professional smart man’s claim, I advise against being too funny.
Yes, humor is one of the keys that opens her heart.
But too much funny acts like a repellent.
A student of mine got ignored by a girl that was ‘totally into him’. So I asked him to show me the conversation.
And it’s true. She seemed very interested…
But he made one too many jokes.
She was invested in the conversation up until this point:
*she doesn’t reply*
*still no answer*
My student meant well, but she was done with his constant stream of jokes.
So she didn’t answer.
He didn’t take the hint, and continued jesting.
The moral of the story?
Women don’t want to date a clown.
Neither does she want to date Serious Sam. He just doesn’t get it.
That’s why Sam went berserk.
What you turn into when you take every joke literally.
IMPORTANT: Sometimes it’s fine to crack jokes or talk serious for hours. If you’re both enjoying it, that’s a way to connect on a deep and intense level.
The vital element is: enjoyment.
And it’s up to you to recognize when the fun leaves the conversation.
Next up is finding the balance between sending too little, and sending too much.
#5: The online dating tip that gets you replies
Even if you’re not a good texter, this simple tip will almost guarantee her reply.
You know the next story:
You match a cutie and start off the conversation.
She replies and your heart skips a beat.
So you shoot another text.
She replies and your brain gets another shot of dopamine.
The captain of your brainship is now high behind the wheel. You lose all control.
A dozen texts later and she blows you off.
But not the good kind.
So what simple tip can guarantee your matches don’t go to waste?
The balance principle.
What does this principle mean?
That the size and frequency of your texts are roughly the same as hers.
A textbook example of the balance principle.
I’m blue. She’s grey.
Anyway, we both send two texts per time, of about equal length.
I’m going to be straight with you: at the start of a conversation, the man always texts a little more.
The reason men put in more effort, is because we have to prove ourselves.
Prove that we aren’t creeps.
Once she sees you’re stone cold pimp, she’ll start working for your attention.
Which leads to the next tip…
#6: Online dating chat tip → how to get her to text you
This snippet of wisdom shows you how to get more and longer texts.
You can motivate her to invest in the convo with an embarrassingly simple technique.
Before I explain it, I have a screenshot that shows it.
Let’s see if you can figure it out yourself.
If you saw well, you recognized that at the start, I do most of the texting.
But at the end, as shown by the green arrow, she sends way more than me.
That’s because I carefully dialed back my input.
Let’s reintroduce the scale.
On the left is the weight of her texts.
On the right, the weight of your texts.
What happens when the weight of your texts presses the button below?
🚨🚨🚨 WARNING: This guy is way too invested. Big chances of insecurity, neediness and record-breaking dry spell. Stay away. 🚨🚨🚨
But what happens when her messages smash the green button?
My hand comes soaring through the air and plants a big fat stamp on your phone, with:
✅✅✅ HOOKED AS FUARK ✅✅✅
(I hope the warranty of your phone hasn’t run out.)
Your job is to get her to invest. But that only happens after you prove your worth.
And until that time, it’s not strange to put in more effort into the conversation than her.
Just don’t write her too many texts, or else you may sound the neediness-alarm.
#7: Online dating text tips → The importance of timing
The timing of your texts can make or break your attraction.
Dating isn’t too different from economics.
So the next quote from a famous financial planner is very relevant:
That’s not right…
Well said, Venita.
Timing is just as crucial when you seduce ladies online.
One of the most valued pieces of advice is:
Don’t answer her texts too quickly, because it makes you seem too available.
There is some truth in that. But I share a different opinion.
Find all about it in the next tip.
#8: Online dating chat tips → When to text back
The definitive answer on quickly texting back, GOOD or BAD, find it here.
Imagine you just matched with a girl.
You send her a text and she replies almost instantly.
And she does so again after your second and third text.
Conventional wisdom says:
Play it slow and make her crave your attention.
Before I give you my take, watch a real Tinder conversation I had.
I’d show the screenshot, but somehow the text turned into a combination of doggos, hieroglyphics and asci. I sent it to a memelord and he believes it’s Dutch?
Whatever, here’s the translation he gave me:
*one hour later*
*20 minutes later*
Did you notice how I stopped noting the time?
That’s because every text followed each other within a fraction of minutes.
That’s THIRTEEN back and forths without keeping her waiting, so she can “chase” me.
Good ol’ Billy Clinton after he attended my Over The Top Game workshop
“Louis, is it always better to reply as fast you can? Aren’t you too available now?”
Good question, homeslice.
Think with me.
What do you think has the most impact?
- Keeping her wait for every answer so you seem hard to get?
- Or exchanging a slew of texts to create lots of emotional momentum and getting her interested in you. And THEN replying more slowly?
Most women rarely answer right away.
They’re at work, with friends, or in the gym working on her squat-booty, you name it.
So the moment you recognize she’s responding quickly, you seize that opportunity in a heartbeat.
These are the moments where you can create a shit ton of attraction.
Are there any moments where I take my time to reply?
If you answer her every text in a millisecond, you scream that:
- You have no life
- Your phone is glued to your hands
- And she is your biggest priority in life.
And when she slows down her tempo, you want to match it.
Remember: it’s all about balance.
When you notice she’s interested, you can switch up your timing.
Check out this convo on films:
Look at the two purple circles and the times they highlight.
A classic example of double texting.
And it basically means she’s still thinking of you.
In short, she’s bought in. Now is when you wait and make her crave your next text.
Look how the same girl behaves when I give her no attention.
After she sends three laughing emojis, she hopes I’ll continue the conversation.
But when she doesn’t get an answer two hours later, she literally asks if that’s all she’s going to get today.
One and a half hours later, she asks if I’m going to ignore her all day.
Does waiting always make the ladies go crazy for you?
There’s only one reason why her reaction is so intense:
She’s used to me responding at the speed of light.
So when I don’t reply instantly, my lack of attention hits her right in the feels.
#9: How to make her go cuckoo for cocoa pops you
How to get a girl from unresponsive to blowing up your voicemail crying for attention.
Once upon a time, I was on my way to München, Germany.
I was in a car together with three good friends.
At the time, I was totally into this one girl.
Our relationship was… complicated.
She was more unpredictable than mixing alcohol and shrooms.
Sometimes she replied to my texts in an instant and said everything my heart desired. Other times she waited days to respond or said nothing.
One of my bros was way older than the rest. He was the veteran who had seen and done it all.
On his advice, I gave her a taste of her own medicine:
As long as I was in München, I would give her ZERO ATTENTION.
First day, no word of her.
Second day, a text.
Later that same day, another text.
She knows I usually reply in the blink of an eye. So she got flustered.
Two texts turned into three. Three into five. And so on.
A little later she gave me a phone call that I let go to voicemail.
That was the first of many.
Within minutes, her voice went from calm and collected to losing her shit.
In her last voicemail, she was crying.
One act of radio silence turned her from ‘cold-hearted killer’ to a broken girl begging for attention.
CAUTION: When dealing with women, the point is never to make them cry over you. That’s just cruel. All I wanted was to be treated with respect.
Although I did secretly like how she cared enough about me to go apeshit.
For a few days, she was like putty in my hands.
But it didn’t last.
Once she got the attention she was used to, she went back to her old hurtful ways.
Which is when I realized that I should cut her out of my life.
Sometimes she just isn’t right for you.
And you need to crush on someone else.
Let me help you find her with the next tip.
#9: Online dating profile tips → how to get more matches
Get 3 quick tips that lead to more matches.
Did you know that right now, your headshots are being spread over the internet and everyone is making fun of you?
Look, your profile photo is the first thing she sees of your Tinder profile.
And for many guys, it’s also the last thing she sees.
*Pours out a little for the rejected homies*
Because your first photo is vital to getting a match, you want to make it irresistible.
1. The waist-up pose
The men who get all the ladies all use the same simple technique:
Shooting a high-quality photo from the waist up.
That’s right. Crop out your feet, legs, and whale-sized donger.
Similar to these gentlemen:
Easy to recognize. High quality. And boner rising.
Or is that just me?
Anyway, as some of you clever readers are already thinking:
“A waist-up pose doesn’t tell you whether or not to look into the camera.”
So what’s best?
2. Looking into or away from the camera
I’ve flip flopped my opinion on this topic more than a fish out of water having a stroke.
But I finally found the definitive answer.
There’s no best.
It all depends on your intentions.
Do you want a girlfriend? Look into the camera. It makes you more trustworthy.
Want a fling? Look away. That makes you more mysterious.
But one thing always remains the same:
Don’t cover your eyes with glasses!
Eyes are called the windows to the soul for a reason.
Next up, smiling.
3. Smiling or not?
If you can, YAS!
A genuine smile can instantly boost your attractiveness up by two notches.
But there’s the catch.
For some, a genuine smile is hard to pull off.
I’m notoriously bad at smiling for the camera. That’s why I prefer to look away from the camera all macho-like.
Does smiling turn you into Michael Myers, go with the option on the right.
#10: Online dating text tips → when you don’t know what to say
What to text if you want to stand out from the rest and steal her heart.
Most of my clients fall into one of two groups:
- Buddy Buzzkill, who asks the dullest questions known to man.
- Or the clown, who can’t stop cracking jokes to save his life.
In between puns and mind-numbingly boring questions lies a sweet spot.
A sweet spot where she has fun answering your questions.
As it happens, I know some of those questions.
Plus, my material gets her thinking, “This guy is so crazy… I love him!”
Here’s ten to get you started:
The would-you-rather-format is great for spicing up any conversation. And can also be used as an icebreaker.
It’s actually 11, but who’s counting? Except for Count Chocula.
If you liked the questions, there’s plenty more where that came from.
Check out my article, 101 Topics To Talk To A Girl About Over Text.
All of the above gives you a very good shot to take her out on a date.
So how do you turn your date into a success?
Find the answer in the next tip.
#11: First date tips for online dating
Make her want to see you again with the next three first date tips.
1. Groom yourself
IMPORTANT: This is not your standard ‘get a haircut’ advise.
Skip this tip at your own peril.
You already know you want to trim your beard and style your hair.
But there are many grooming steps that men overlook and make women hurl.
So let me help you become the sexiest version of yourself:
- Don’t use too much gel or wax. If she likes you, ladies want to run their fingers through your hair. And they don’t like it sticky.
- Next time you take a shaver to your face, also visit your ears, nose and that spot in between your eyebrows. While you’re at it, cut down any hairs on your neck.
- Take care of your hands. For my gym bros, that doesn’t just mean cutting your fingernails. Also get rid of your calluses or moisturize to make your skin soft.
For brevity, I’m going to reduce this sub-header to a quote:
Walk into a perfume shop and ask one of the ladies to recommend a bottle.
Buy a small bottle if you like to change your scent regularly. Buy a 100 ml if you want a signature fragrance.
Replace or buy another when it’s finished.
3. Most important dating tip EVER
Almost everyone who is not a dating coach gets this wrong.
Is your go-to-date movies or drinks in a café?
Then you’re losing out on coolpoints.
The venue is nowhere near as important as what you do.
Let me explain.
You don’t want to enter a bar and lock yourself inside like it’s DEFCON 1.
That’s a waste of precious time.
You can raise far more attraction by going on an adventure.
Here’s an example.
But before you read it, focus less on the specifics of the date, and more on the atmosphere:
- Meet up on your local town square or train station.
- Walk to a fun bar 5 to 10 minutes away.
- Order plus finish one round of drinks and leave.
- Next, go to a park and sit on the swings.
- Kiss and part ways, or go home together.
Never wait to kiss a girl at the end of the date.
It’s corny and it shows her you only follow routines (that which Hollywood taught you).
Once you sense she’s interested, go for the kiss. I almost always kiss my date on the way from venue #1 to venue #2.
Using the above example, that would be when walking her from the bar to the park.
For 20 date tips, read my First Tinder Date Tips article.
This wraps up Online Dating Tips For Guys.
If you want some extra help with your conversations, like asking her out on the date or when you need some inspiration.
Check out my 10 Texts That Always Work. Just follow the link.
And don’t worry, it’s totally FREE.
For more tips, check out these articles:
And don't forget your download below ;)