Sometimes you feel your best photos are selfies. You know your best angles and can give it a couple of tries. Or maybe you just don’t have any good photos.
So, can you use selfies on Tinder? Or should you stay away from them completely?
In this article, I’ll give you a clear and detailed answer. Because it depends on how you use your selfies on dating apps.In this article:More...
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Do selfies work on Tinder?
The short answer: No.
Selfies are decent at showing off your looks. But they do little else.
If you know our TextGod FAT-Method for online dating profiles, you know good profile pictures show:
- Fun: A potential match wants to see that you’re fun to be with and have an awesome life.
- Attractiveness: Someone wants to feel physically attracted to you.
- Trust: They want to know if you’re not weird, a stalker or even dangerous.
And if your selfies only show you’re attractive, your selfie is doing more harm than good.
Selfies do a very poor job of conveying personality.
And that’s just one of the reasons why selfies usually don’t work.
There are however selfies that do work. Selfies that do show FAT. These are great as a second or third picture on your profile.
More reasons on why selfies don’t or do work later.
If you want to know what the perfect profile picture looks like, and how to make them, check out this article:
What about mirror selfies on Tinder?
The mirror selfie is unfortunately the worst type of selfie for your Tinder profile.
It’s not about whether you look attractive in your selfie or not… It’s what it communicates about your personality.
Mirror selfies tend to communicate any of these:
- That you’re too vain. You like to look at yourself in the mirror.
- That you love yourself a bit too much.
- That you’re insecure since you’re trying too hard to look good.
And this can actually hurt your trustworthiness and how fun you look.
Selfies are more harmful for men than for women
Men don’t judge women as harch for using selfies, as the other way around.
And that’s largely because the FAT-Method is slightly less relevant for women:
- Men get attracted more by looks than women do according to research.
- Safety is less of a concern for men since they are physically stronger. So Trust is less important.
So as a woman, you can get away with a couple of selfies showing off how attractive you are.
But as a man, you definitely should try to avoid the bad type selfies as much as possible.
5 Reasons why selfies don’t work on Tinder and other dating apps
Here’s 5 common selfie mistakes that cost you matches.
Most people make at least 3 of them.
1. The poor quality of selfies (compared to a DSLR)
Though it’s only a picture, looking like a blur isn’t attractive.
Even if you own a cutting edge smartphone that rivals the latest Canon, your selfie will probably be from an unflattering angle.
I made some bad selfie examples for this article, and briefly uploaded them on my Tinder for you:
Poor-quality photos make you seem immature, lazy, and unsuccessful.
What makes selfies even worse is that they’re mostly shot indoors. In horrible lighting.
Making your every imperfection stand out. And turning you into someone you’re not.
2. Selfies make you look like you have no life
Remember you want to show your personality? You want to show you have a cool life and it’s fun to hang out with you.
However, selfies do the opposite. Especially if you have two or more selfies.
It leaves your potential match wondering things like:
- Doesn’t he have any friends?
- I don’t want to date an outcast?
- Why are all his photos at home? Doesn’t he have a cool passion to share?
- He’s in his car taking photos of himself? Okay, cool… (not)
- Does he never go to clubs? (Clubs often have paid photographers shooting pics for promotion)
- Does he look bad in every other photo so that he has to make them himself?
All red flags you don’t want to raise.
Because what every woman is after, is a man who has his life together.
3. Shirtless selfies make you look vain
Sure, your washboard abs are sexy.
But they also make you look like a meathead. And that’s a major turnoff.
Studies show that women get turned on by kindness, empathy, and ambition. To name a few.
And the only ambition you’re showing in your selfie is an obsession with making your muscles pop.
4. Selfies look unnatural
Imagine you’re in nature. You feel completely relaxed. You breathe in the fresh air and suddenly a friend snaps a picture of you! This photo will probably look amazing, it really captured you in the moment.
Selfies can never look that natural. They feel forced since you have to be self-aware when making them.
And it’s not your fault. Unless you’re a model or actor, putting on an authentic and warm smile is difficult on command. Ignoring authenticity, selfies on Tinder also tend to be shot from poor angles.
Magnifying your imperfections. Or magically turning you into Mister Potatohead.
A study shows that taking selfies from too close distorts your face. Shooting your selfie from 12 inches (30 centimeters) away is like standing in front of a funhouse mirror. It changes all your proportions and gives you a giant nose.
5. Selfies don’t tell stories
Yeah, you’re crouched down in front of a BMW. But what is that supposed to tell me?
That you’re proud of your German heritage? Who knows. And that’s the problem.
Every photo is a window into your life. And when she peeks inside, she sees you surrounded by a whole lot of emptiness.
Which leads her to boredom and disappointment. Not a very attractive combo.
5 Types of selfies that do work
Not all selfies on Tinder and other dating apps are bad.
In fact, if selfies are high quality, don’t unnecessarily show off your body and tell a story, they can get her to swipe you right.
Let me give you some examples.
1. The interactive selfie
The selfie I’m about to show you is not exactly interactive. It’s just a still image.
But what I mean is that the photographer and the background are working together.
Sound confusing? Here’s the selfie.
See what I mean?
This guy is holding a cherry between his fingers so that it looks like it’s resting on the spoon in the background.
What makes this selfie work, is that the model and the background play an equal role.
Whereas most selfies revolve only around the model.
But as soon as you shop the background out of this image, the selfie doesn’t make any sense.
In short, background-model teamwork is epic.
2. The sporty selfie
No, no. I’m not talking about the gym selfie. Put that self-loving work of art away.
I mean a real display of skill.
Like this surfer bro riding a gnarly wave.
Do you see how this is much cooler than someone casually flexing his pythons in the gym?
It’s a world of difference.
3. The I-can’t-believe-it selfie
Your intention with your Tinder pictures is to make her have an experience.
To give her insights into your personality and life.
One way to do that is to make a photo that simply makes her go: wow!
Luckily for our photographer, he stayed put.
It’s of course a fake photo. Which is good news.
Because that means you don’t need to be a pilot with a 6-figure salary.
All you need is a photoshop subscription. Or a couple bucks and some tech-savvy guy on Fiverr.
It doesn’t matter how you shop yourself into a crazy scenario. All you need to know is that this photo went viral and people loved it.
4. The I-have-no-fear selfie
Do you know anyone without a fear of heights? Me neither.
Now even if you don’t find her attractive, I’m willing to bet that you’d swipe right.
Why? Because she’s got you by the balls. And now your heart and mind will follow.
Put simply, this death-defying lady is clearly living an epic life. And you just want to be part of it.
Crazy how a selfie can do that. The best part?
With a little magic from Photoshop, you can do it too.
5. The celebrity selfie
I’m going to be 100% honest with you.
The celebrity selfie has mixed results. And that’s because it ventures into bragging territory.
All the other selfies we discussed raised our moods by being (somewhat) impressive.
The interactive selfie showed wit. The sporty selfie showed skill. The skyscraper selfie showed courage.
But posing with a celebrity can come across as try-hard.
And that’s because the selfie-maker is coasting on someone else’s achievements.
A good middle ground is photoshopping yourself into existing celebrity photos.
If you know Average Rob, you know exactly what I mean.
If you don’t, check him out on Insta. Rob is a hilarious dude.
And don’t worry if you don’t have the same shopping skills as him.
If anything, your bad photoshop-skills will make your selfie all the more funny.
Before we end the article, I have one more question.
Do you ever worry about what to write your Tinder match, or perhaps even your real life crush?
If so, I’ve got just what you need.
I know what you’re thinking, I’ve already given you so much today.
But I’m feeling more generous than Father Christmas.
So here are 10 unique texts of my own that always work. Whether it’s asking her out, keeping the conversation going, or sending a killer first line, you can find it in my TextGod Toolkit.
Have fun on Tinder, brochacho.
And don't forget your download below ;)