101 Topics to Talk to a Girl About Over Text (Crush or Girlfriend)

You’re talking to someone you like and suddenly… you draw a blank. Nothing fun comes up.

And you’re afraid to say the wrong thing and make things boring or awkward.

Let me help you. I’ve got 101 things to talk to a girl about over text that’ll make you her favorite person to talk to.

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What are the best things to talk about with a girl over text?

All the best subjects have one thing in common: they’re incredibly fun to talk about.

What makes a subject fun?

Usually, when it has one or more of the next elements:

  • It’s unique. It’s not a common topic to discuss.
  • It’s playful. This can mean funny, teasy, or flirty.
  • It’s relevant. Something the other person is invested in or perhaps even passionate about.
  • It’s uplifting. Good conversation always raises our spirits.

Boring conversations vs good conversations

The above obviously gives you little direction on what exact topics to pick.

That’s what the rest of this article is for.

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The most important thing when choosing a topic to talk about

Whatever you do, make sure the conversation doesn’t turn into an interview.

The best conversations feel smooth and flow from topic to topic.

So when your conversation turns into something that could be held in a poorly lit room in Guantanamo Bay, stop. You’ve gone too far.

The only time you want to aggressively switch between topics is when you’re playing some kind of game, such as 21 Questions.

1. A brighter future

These questions all invite her to imagine fun things. Almost everyone enjoys answering these.

  • What’s the first thing you’d do if you won the lottery?
  • What would you with your day if you didn’t have to work tomorrow?
  • If you could have lunch with anyone in the world (including fictional or dead), who would you pick?
  • If you could master any skill right now, what would you pick and why?
  • What’s the last great book you read / movie you watched?
  • If you could have one superpower, what would it be?
  • If you could say one thing to all the men on earth, what would that be?
  • What are you looking forward to doing most this month?
  • What’s your favorite type of vacation?
  • What will you be asking Santa for this year?
  • What do you daydream about most?
  • If you could change one thing about the world, what would it be?

How do you know if she’s enjoying the conversation?

By recognizing the signals.

2. Food

Everybody shovels it down their throats, but food is more than a common interest.

If you phrase it right, food can also be erotic.

Find out her favorite food and you can feed it to her.

  • What’s the last time you cooked a meal you were proud of?
  • Cilantro, good or soap?
  • Cinnamon rolls or donuts?
  • Pizza or poke bowl?
  • Candy corn, yes or no?

3. Her home and neighborhood

No matter what you call home, it’s always connected to strong feelings.

It’s the place where you eat, store your memories, and where the magic happens.

Warning: when asking someone questions about where she lives, don’t try to find out her exact whereabouts. That’s creepy. Just stick to the area for now.

  • Do you and your roommates get along?
  • If you could live anywhere in the world, where would you go?
  • What object makes your place feel most like home?
  • What’s your favorite thing about your neighborhood?
  • What’s the first thing you do after you get home from work?
  • If your house was burning down, and your family and pets were safe, what would you rescue from the fire?

4. Her work

Not everyone enjoys their job. For these people, their work is just a way to earn money.

So don’t keep grilling someone about work if it’s not something that excites them.

  • What do you like most about what you do?
  • Do you like your job or would you prefer doing something else?
  • If you had to leave your job and start a business, what would you do?
  • You’re going to be on Shark Tank in 10 minutes. What do you pitch?
  • What’s the coolest thing you learned on your job?

Holy Tip:

The most important piece of a flirty conversation is not the subject. What’s crucial, is the emotions you’re triggering.

And if you trigger the right emotions, even a talk on history can be exciting.

The English industrial revolution, Edgar Degas’ role in the creation of impressionism, or the view from the Saint Peter’s Church in Riga can all make her heart beat faster if… you keep it flirty.

It doesn’t take her long to realize what kind of tip I was talking about.

If she’s into it, the conversation will get a whole lot flirtier.

5. Hobbies and free time

Here’s where you’ll really find out who she is.

Is she a bookworm, a gamer girl, or a witch who is looking for a virgin to sacrifice?

You’ll find out with the next questions to ask over text.

  • If you had an extra hour a day, what would you do with it?
  • What’s your favorite way to unwind?
  • Would your hobbies be any different if you were rich?
  • Do you prefer doing exciting or relaxing hobbies?
  • Do you gravitate towards social hobbies or ones you can do alone?

6. Sports

Pretty much everyone plays or enjoys watching a sport.

If she’s sporty she may play hockey, volleyball, or Two Thumbs.

And even if her favorite sport is sitting on her ass, that doesn’t mean she doesn’t like to watch other people get their sweat on.

So figure out what her deal is.

  • What do you do to keep in shape?
  • Do you prefer taking the elevator or stairs?
  • Did you ever get picked last in high school dodgeball?
  • More of a gym gal or a hiking-in-nature gal?
  • If you could make a living as an athlete, what sport would you pick?

7. Travel

An incredibly easy topic to talk about because pretty much everyone loves to go and explore new places.

Here are some questions you can consider asking.

  • What travel destination could you never grow tired of?
  • What’s the coolest thing travel has taught you?
  • If you could go on an all-expenses paid trip for the weekend, where would you go?
  • If you could wake up in any place tomorrow, where would you want to be?
  • What place do you NEVER want to go?

Holy Tip:

Even though this article blesses you with a mountain of questions… it’s best not to overuse them.

One of the pillars of seduction, as a man, is leading. Firing question after question is not leading. It’s asking. Sometimes even begging.

Luckily, you can open her up without using questions. Namely, statements.

Instead of asking, you say, “You seem like..” or “I get the feelings you’re…” Even if your assumption is wrong, she’ll gladly correct you.

The conversations of team TextGod and I are loaded with statements. And if you don’t know how to make them, here’s some inspiration.

The 10 Texts That Always Work. Grab ‘em and use ‘em.

8. Fashion

Most girls legit love fashion.

Just visit any clothes shop and see how the women’s department spans two floors, while the men share a floor with the children.

Get her to open up about clothes, and you’ll have a happy first date. And perhaps an idea for a second date.

  • Do you prefer to shop online or in person?
  • If you could describe your style, what would it be?
  • What color do you like to wear most?
  • What outfit do you wear if you want to look sexy?
  • What’s your go-to outfit if you want to feel comfortable?
  • What do you wear at home when you have no company?
  • What’s your favorite clothing item?

9. Music

Music is a great topic for chatting, unless you start the convo with the worst possible question.

Do you like music?

No, I’m the one person on Earth who doesn’t like music.

Ask dumb questions, get dumb answers.

Here are some better things to ask her about.

  • What song do you currently have on repeat?
  • Who’s the best singer ever, dead or alive?
  • What’s your latest music discovery?
  • What’s the last concert you’ve been to?
  • What are some songs you were crazy about when you were younger?
  • What’s more important to you when listening to music, the words or the melody?

10. Movies

Movies are an easy way to figure out her personality, without going deep.

Does she like romance? She believes in happy endings.

Is she into horror? She likes to scream.

Does she like Christmas movies? Yippie ka yee, motherf#$&.

  • Do you prefer films or series?
  • What’s your favorite movie genre?
  • If movie sets were real, what location or universe would you want to visit most?
  • What actor would you instantly sleep with if he asked you?
  • What film sequel has disappointed you the most?
  • What’s a popular movie that you’ve never seen and why not?

11. Books

Here are some questions to figure out if she’s a bibliophile.

  • What book or series do you hope and pray will be turned into a movie or TV show one day?
  • When was the last time you read a book?
  • Do you ever read fiction or are you more into self-help?
  • What book are you currently reading?
  • If you had to recommend me one book, which one would it be?

12. TV

TV… the one parent you could always count on.

Giving us classics like:

  • “D’oh!”
  • “How you doin’?”
  • And, “Winter is coming…” And it was lame, amirite?

Figure out if your date is a lady of culture with the next questions.

  • Joey, Ross, and Chandler. Who do you marry, fuck and kill?
  • What’s your favorite show of all time?
  • If we were going to watch a series together, what would you put on?
  • Are there any series that are considered awful, but you secretly love?
  • What’s your last TV character crush?
  • If you could completely forget one show and rewatch it, which one would you pick?
  • What TV character do you wish you were more like?

13. Pets

“Aww…. That’s so cute!”

She says sarcastically when she walks into your room and sees your collection of beanie babies.

Anyway, on with the questions.

  • What pets did you have when growing up?
  • How many nicknames do you have for your pet and what’s your favorite?
  • Would you have a dog if you lived in an apartment?
  • What’s your favorite animal?
  • What’s the hardest thing about being a pet owner?

14. Humor

There’s nothing more attractive than a girl who’s funny even when she’s angry.

*girl gives me sass for no reason*

What’s up your ass today?

Just a burger

If you also want a girl with a sense of humor, be sure to find out before you make it official.

  • What’s the darkest joke you like?
  • What are your top three comedy films?
  • What’s the last time you laughed so hard that you cried?
  • What’s the most inappropriate joke you ever made?
  • What’s the dankest meme you have on your phone?
  • Who’s your favorite stand-up comic?

15. Learning

What she spends time learning says a lot about her.

  • What are you currently studying?
  • Do you ever watch youtube videos and make notes?
  • If you had to give a TED talk, what would be your subject?
  • What subject do you know more about than most people?
  • If you had the time and money to start learning anything tomorrow, what would it be?

16. Geekie & Tech stuff

Are you talking to a nerd, techie, or dungeon master?

Make a dexterity check.

If you doubt that your date falls into the geek category, skip to the next topic.

Because the next questions will only confuse and scare her.

But if she is a sexy trekkie, she’ll LOVE to answer these questions.

The questions that every geek loves to answer:

  • Star Wars or Star Trek?
  • Who shot first?
  • Elvish or Klingon?
  • Who is your go-to character to play in Mario Kart?
  • DC or Marvel?
  • Time travel, possible or not?
  • What’s your zombie apocalypse survival plan?
  • If you went to Hogwarts, what house would you be sorted into?
  • Have you ever played Dungeons and Dragons?

17. What you notice about her

Everyone likes to know what other people think of them.

So do her that favor and tell her what made her stand out from all the other women.

Just don’t make the mistake of saying her looks. Even if she’s beautiful, rarely do beautiful women want to hear that her looks are the reason you think she’s special. After all, deep down we know that our appearance has little to do with who we are.


18. Her goals

There are few things more exciting to us than someone who’s genuinely curious about us.

The one big exception is when you barely know each other.

Then digging too deep is a little weird.

So it’s usually better to ask about her goals and passions when you know each other a bit better.

  • What’s something you’re proud of that not enough people ask you about?
  • How would you live your life differently if you weren’t afraid?
  • What would your life look like if you achieved all your goals?
  • Would you still work even if you were rich?
  • What makes you get up in the morning?
  • What one thing can you do to improve your life that you aren’t already doing? What’s stopping you?

19. Her inner world

Before we get into the questions, I want you to drill these two things in your head:

  1. Never ask questions that you’re not prepared to answer yourself.
  2. Make sure she’s comfortable talking to you about sensitive topics before going so personal.

With that out of the way, let’s dive into the questions.

  • What’s something you’ve dealt with that you never want to go through again?
  • Have you changed in the last 3 years? If so, how?
  • If you could send your younger self a 3-word note, what would it say?
  • Have you ever experienced something shitty that turned out to be a blessing in disguise?
  • Do you make your decisions based on your head or heart?
  • What’s the best end to a tough day?
  • What’s the last time you cried?
  • Does socializing give you more energy than it takes?
  • If you had six months left to live, what would you do?
  • What does your perfect day look like?
  • What are three things in your life you can’t do without?

20. Dating and attraction

One of my favorite topics.

Asking dating and attraction-related questions has taught me so much about women.

I highly recommend you do the same.

  • What’s your worst date experience?
  • What do you do if you want to seduce a guy you’re into?
  • What do you find the most attractive male feature?
  • Do you think a guy should ask to kiss you or just read the signs and go for it?
  • What’s your biggest turn-off?
  • Have you ever really liked a guy until he did something so bad that you didn’t find him attractive anymore?
  • What’s the best way for a guy to sweep you off your feet?
  • Could you fall in love with a guy who’s out of your league?

21. Her ideas on love and relationships

If your intentions are romantic, it’s a smart idea to figure out what her stance is on romantic topics.

  • Do you think monogamous relationships work?
  • What does monogamy mean for you? Can your boyfriend still flirt with other women or is that already crossing a line?
  • What behavior in a partner is a dealbreaker for you?
  • What do you look for in a partner?
  • What’s the thing you love most about being in a relationship?
  • Do you think it’s okay to lie to your partner? If so, when?

Frequently Asked Questions

1. How do you hold her interest?

The key to keeping a girl looking forward to your texts is how your messages make her feel. If she could be doing anything from hanging out with friends and watching cat videos, your texts need to be captivating.

That’s why you constantly want to change the emotional flavor of your messages. Don’t get predictable. Send her a mix of funny, flirty, teasing, chill, and interested texts. That way your messages are fun and fresh.

2. How do you have smooth conversations?

The best conversations are when chatting feels fun and easy. Even if she doesn’t really know you, it almost feels like you’re long-lost friends. So how do you make that happen?

By avoiding confusion and any awkward topic changes. When conversations feel stiff or difficult, it’s typically because we make weird jokes that don’t really land or when we ask random questions because we don’t know what to say. The root of the problem? We’re trying to impress her.

To have smooth conversations, I recommend two things:

  1. Set the conversational bar low. It’s easy to keep adding to the conversation when you can talk about simple, everyday things.
  2. Always try to link your text to hers. If she just said something about cats, you can (for example) talk about HER views on cats, pets, or animals, or you can share YOUR views on those topics.

Do these two things and I guarantee your conversations will start to feel effortless.

3. How do you flirt over text?

Flirting is exchanging teasing remarks to make each other laugh. It’s a little like playing for adults. And it doesn’t have to be sexual at all, that depends on your intentions.

In its essence, flirting is being a little challenging. Rather than constantly agreeing and talking about commonalities, you’re slamming the breaks and playfully saying how you aren’t compatible.

Suppose she says something you don’t like, then you can reply: “Just when I started to like you, you say something so wrong. Shame.”

For more on flirting, check out my next article:

What topics to talk to a girl about – Conclusion

What things to talk about with a girl shouldn’t be something you care too much about. It’s usually a side effect of deeply wanting to win someone over. And it’s this desire that typically gets in the way of fun conversation.

Rather than getting obsessed with impressing someone, focus on having fun. That’s a far better guide than your desire to be liked. Even better still, treat her like you would a good buddy.

Because with your friends, you speak your mind, make jokes, and give them a hard time. And it’s these behaviors that will make you more attractive to her. So what topics you talk about are actually secondary to how freely you express yourself.

Of course, this is easier said than done. That’s why I want to give you a gift that’ll make it easy for you to get her hooked on your texts.

What’s the awesome gift I want to share with you?

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Click the gold button down below to get a video of me explaining exactly what it is. Do it now and you can make any girl smile with you texts today.


Louis Farfields

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