You’re getting new matches, but you’re running into a problem.
You don’t know what to say after hi.
And your conversations are going nowhere.
No worries. After reading this article you’ll always know what to say.
- 3 Strategies for what to say after hi
- 13 Stealable lines to win her over after hi
- A tip that’ll triple your texting success (longer convos guaranteed)
- The best way to break the ice
- How to get the girl to chase you after hi
By the way, do you sometimes get stuck in online conversations? Very frustrating... but there is a simple solution. I created a bonus named The 10 Texts That Always Work, including my favorite text to send when I have gotten her number, an easy message to get her out on a date, and some witty lines to get the conversation going. Download it, it's completely free and easy to use.
#1: What to say after hi
You’ve got this cutey in your phone awaiting your next text.
You start of the conversation over text…
Short and sweet, right?
But what now? Should you add something extra or just keep it simple?
Luckily, after some time she replies…
Damn, now what?
Your gears are grinding, you go to your inbox and send her the next text.
And within a few seconds, you see her typing out her message.
You clap your hands from excitement.
You smile from ear to ear.
But then it hits you…
What do you say now?
You have no idea!
And that’s why you’re here.
Before I give you the good stuff, I’m going to start with the bad stuff.
That is: what NOT to say.
#2: THREE THINGS YOU DON’T WANT TO SAY AFTER HI
Before I give you effective and stealable lines that raise attraction, something better.
“Something better than stealable lines??? Blasphemy!”
Put your pitchfork down, dear reader.
And let me explain.
Knowing what to say and being attractive over text gets MUCH easier when you…
Stop making texting mistakes.
“Ah… I think you may have a point, Louis.”
So let me tell you three big mistakes people make in text conversations.
#1: Being too linear
I get it, if you want to understand conversation you have to think in straight lines, not squiggly lines.
That’s why men use straight rulers to measure their dongers and not a piece of string.
Anyway, keeping your conversations too structured leads to disaster.
Also known as:
And when she’s bored, you lose her attention. And probably all chances of meeting up with her.
So what’s the key to good conversation?
How do you stay interesting?
By thinking of conversation as basketball, not tennis.
You see, tennis is very linear.
The ball moves from one side of the net to the other, until one guy hits a homerun… or something.
And so on.
Basketball is much more free and unpredictable.
When you get the ball, you can: dribble, shoot, pass, do layups, dunks, tricks… Plus, you can move into all directions.
Suppose she sends you a boring question:
You could answer her question and smack it right back.
Or you could think in terms of basketball:
You recognized she didn’t have anything fun to say. So you did her a favor and answered a ‘hidden’ question that you thought was worthwhile and interesting.
#2: Not editing your life
Life tosses stuff at you 24 hours a day.
So you’re always dealing with new events, experiences, and feelings.
Where’s the texting mistake?
Most people don’t know how to edit the boring stuff out of their lives.
So when a girl asks:
These people don’t have an immediate answer ready.
(That line was an exaggeration.)
Or perhaps you have a holiday photo on your Tinder and a girl asks about your Tokyo trip. To which you answer:
You know, so much great stuff. It was
busy and we went out a lot. The people
This is boring because it’s more or less the answer you’d expect!
Plus it’s such a general description of a trip that it could apply to any other big city.
What you ought to do is relive the experience in your mind and edit out the boring. Or even easier, pick out the good.
4 Streets with 100s of bars. The best
thing? Every bar only has like 5 seats.
So if you visit a bar with friends, you take
every seat in the house. And
basically get your own personal
See the difference?
Edit your memories and take out the highlights.
#3: You’re not stimulating your mind
Most people are stuck in a routine.
And have been stuck in that routine for weeks, months… perhaps even years.
If you do the same things over and over again, you kind of get stuck.
At least, conversationally.
If you’re bored of your own life, you won’t ever talk about it with excitement.
Those are the words of someone who doesn’t like his job. Or is a terrible storyteller.
If you’re able to look at your life with excitement, you’ll become excited.
And let me tell you, an excited person is almost always interesting to listen to.
get more money
“Louis, I don’t like my job and I don’t have the money to do exciting stuff like sky-diving and traveling the world.”
But I’m not asking you to do anything crazy expensive
Heck, you could even pick up a good book.
Did you know that giant, 20 feet high (6 meters) sloths once roamed the earth? These sloths weighed 4.4 tons! A full-grown grizzly bear only weighs 500 pounds.
I didn’t know anything about giant sloths either until I read about it in Sapiens: A Brief History of Humankind.
So when someone asks me what I’ve been up to lately, I talk about giant sloths.
And have some pretty fun conversations.
So find the excitement in your life by stimulating yourself. (Hehehe, masturbation jokes.)
Whether that stimulation comes from books, work, sports, tv shows, you name it.
#3: THREE WAYS TO TO WIN HER OVER AFTER HI
Like talking in real life, conversing over text is an elusive concept.
Many people want to be great in conversation, but how many people are actually great conversationalists?
And that’s because good conversation is hard to define.
It’s too vague.
That’s why I’m about to get real specific and give you 3 ways to win someone over after hi.
#1: Build suspense like this
When most people match with someone and get into a traditional convo, they rush into the next topic.
But what these people don’t realize, is that they’re not being captivating.
If you want someone to listen and engage with you, you must captivate them.
How do you do that?
interesting about bartenders?
There’s no way your match will zone out, because you stopped on a cliffhanger.
She’d LOVE to hear what you think about bartenders.
Because she IS one.
Plus, by firing off the suspense text, you keep the conversation rolling while buying yourself some time to think up your answer.
One of the most important aspects of texting is momentum:
Keeping the conversational ball rolling for extended periods of time.
If you exchange 1 – 3 texts a day, you’ll eventually lose her interest.
Because your conversation is staying too superficial. You’re just skimming the surface.
And she can’t get a good idea of what it’s like to hang out with you.
So try to have text exchanges of 10 – 15 minutes so she can feel how fun you are.
Because if she doesn’t feel like the convo is fun, she definitely won’t want to meet up.
For more on what to say after the suspense text, check out my Clickbait Opener.
Which can be used any time to build suspense. Plus, you get 2 lines to reel her in even further.
#2: Tease and compliment
Here comes a quick personal story.
A close friend of mine has a buddy called Mike.
My bro always speaks really highly of Mike. But for the longest time, I never met him.
Until one day the stars aligned and the three of us were going to hang out.
Now what do you imagine would have been the best way to break the ice with Mike?
(Yes, this is real life but the same principles apply to texting.)
I could have said:
“Hey, Mike. Nice to meet you. Heard so much about you.”
I could have also gone with:
“Hey, Mike. My bro always speaks so highly of you.”
Authentic and better than what most people would do.
But we can do better:
“Mike… how much are you paying my bro to say good things about you?”
Now we’re teasing and putting Mike on the backfoot. But in a fun and playful way.
Not really sure on how to tease?
Just grab my 10 Texts That Always Work and get a couple stealable texts for nada.
– Fun answers to boring questions
– How to ask her out in a non-needy way
– How to write more attractive texts in general
Tldr; tease your match!
#3: Make someone else the expert
Everybody has different talents and experiences that we don’t.
And it’s worth giving them credit.
Does her dating profile say she’s a management consultant?
Make her the authority and ask her what that means.
around between 9 to 5?
As you can see, you don’t want to ask her in a boring way.
Fill in what you think her job may be.
Plus, you earn points by being honest about what you don’t know.
Perhaps you do know what a management consultant is.
In that case, earn points by making her the authority.
interns at my work
these lemmings, and I may take
you out to my favorite bar
#4: The tip that’ll triple your texting success
If you’re reading this, you’re completely focused on what to say after hi.
So you’ve got tunnel vision.
And are unable to see what truly matters.
Why the f@#% are you saying Hi in the first place?!
(Perhaps she’s the one saying hi, but please let me finish my rant and get to that later.)
Hands down the most received text women get from men on Tinder, Instagram or any other texting platform is:
Or one of its countless variations.
These are a handful of texts my ex-girlfriend got on her Instagram in one day:
What does that mean?
‘Hi’ triggers ZERO emotions for her.
While the text may once have made her feel flattered, now it hurts her soul.
Which means you should stay away from hi at all times.
“At all times, Louis?”
- ALL. TIMES.
Hi earns you a direct trip to her spam folder.
And you don’t want that.
If you’re going to open a girl on Tinder, slide into a girls DMs, or hit up a girl on Facebook…
You always want to stand out from the rest.
Or else she’ll ignore you.
And can you blame her?
Hi adds nothing to the conversation, besides starting it.
Even if she likes you, she probably won’t reply anything more exciting than:
So if that’s the best possible response you can get from Hi, why even bother?
Imagine you could break the ice with an opener that would trigger her to reply with multiple texts.
Wouldn’t that be great?
Well, that’s what you’re about to get.
#5: How to break the ice and get more than ‘hi’
Now you know saying hi is the worst, let’s move on to the best opener.
The best opener motivates a woman to:
- Reply (I’m sure you know how important that is)
- Reply with more than one text
- Reply with positivity
Pretty damn good.
So how do you write the best opener?
To save you a lifetime of study, let keep the answer concise:
By keeping it personal.
Suppose the girl you like is a scuba instructor.
What’s a simple text you could send her that is miles better than hi?
first one I trust to ask
Lighthearted and relevant.
And if you remember what we said in a previous tip, we’re making her the expert. Which is always flattering.
That opener too specific for you?
Let me give you a more generic opener that works:
but I had to text you after I saw you
Next, you fill in the blank.
Maybe a band, videogame, movie, or hobby. Anything that you do truly like.
Besides being relevant, this opener is good because it lets you hold onto your power: you aren’t all-in, you’re still curious if you’d get along.
Since most girls get compliments on their looks, you stand out for trying to build a connection by commenting on her taste and personality.
Now for one last stealable opener:
what you did in photo (blank)
“Louis, aren’t you now doing exactly what you just told us was a bad idea: complimenting her looks.”
But it does solve one huge issue what many guys suffer from:
Keeping it too nice. Too friendly.
This way you’ll instantly set the right tone.
And because she knows you’re interested in her sexually, she’s more likely to excuse a little boring conversation later.
#6: Why she doesn’t invest after after you say hi
Knowing what to say after hi is good.
Knowing how to make her chase you after hi is better.
And it’s something all of my clients want to get better at.
Because one of the the biggest complaints I get in my coaching calls and emails is:
“Why do girls always put in so little effort? I’m tired of putting in all the work.”
To which I always reply:
“Have you ever made her feel that she may not be able to get you?”
The answer is almost always no.
My more experienced clients and readers will scream YES!
But when I eventually see their conversation, I instantly spot where it went wrong.
Yes, my texting veterans sometimes showed the girl she couldn’t just win them over with a snap of her fingers.
But they also made a crucial mistake, they didn’t stick to their guns.
By which I mean, if they got upset with her, or pushed her away in some way, it was only an act.
Deep down inside my students were already convinced they wanted to ask her out.
In short, they were playing hard to get, but weren’t actually hard to get.
And the girls could smell the fakery from a mile away.
So how do you get a girl to chase you?
Find out in the next tip.
#7: How to get the girl to chase you after hi
The most attractive guys in the world easily get girls to chase them.
“Well, DUH! Are you also captain of the SS Obvious, Louis?”
I am not, my sarcastic friend.
When I say attractive, I don’t necessarily mean handsome. I mean the guys with the most attractive behavior.
The men with… dare I say it… $w@g.
Which is just another word for being cool, confident, and at ease with yourself.
Pretty ambiguous, right?
So let me give you two imitatible thing every attractive guy has:
- The ability to express those standards
Which I can explain to you using a term from the food industry.
The bliss point.
In the food industry, this is the optimal level of fat, salt and sugar that keeps you craving more.
Think about: peanut butter chocolate, Nutella, french fries with ketchup, Oreos.
Even though you can fill your belly with Oreos, you can eat more because you don’t feel satiated.
There’s also a bliss point to texting. An optimal level of salty and sweet texts that keep her wanting more.
So how do you make her addicted to you?
Remember that awful ‘Hi’ text?
It’s a crowd favorite among people who don’t know what to say.
And when a girl replies to your ‘Hi’ with her own ‘Hi’, she’s basically screaming:
“Figure out a topic of conversation! It’s your job, dude. Just start something.”
In fact, every man should see himself as the guardian of fun. If the text convo ever turns sour, it’s your job to make it exciting again.
So what do you do if the girl you’re texting is constantly (accidentally) killing the vibe of the conversation?
The ultimate I like you but I don’t know what to say-text.
What’s the bliss point response?
out a more specific question and try again 😉
It’s flirty and forces her to try harder.
Let’s discuss another scenario you’ll run into: the low-invest thank you after you blew her away with your opener.
Let me give you a good example using my own text. Context: she was swinging around the American flag and felt bad because Trump was president.
How did she reply?
As you can see I didn’t reply to the first text she sent, because it was a terribly low investment.
She caught on later and doubletexted me.
But it wasn’t much better.
So what did I say?
Now, please keep in mind: I opened the conversation with a very high-investment text. So I have the ‘right’ to be extra cheeky and call her out for writing generic lines.
Now, to prove that being cheeky works:
Not only did she send me three texts, she even started to prove her worth to me: “I’m pretty far from generic.”
Now for a third and final scenario that you’ll find yourself in: when she goes silent on the day of the date.
Yes, I know. You’re not quite at the stage of setting up the date.
But you will be soon enough.
When that time comes, you want to know what to do if you haven’t texted in a few days. And she’s quiet on the day of the date.
Here’s the bliss point response to her silence:
I haven’t heard from you and I have
other things I’d like to do if not 🙂
You’re speaking your mind, showing you have standards, and keeping it respectful.
That almost marks the end of what to say after hi.
Before I sign off, one last thing.
You obviously want to apply the tips and tricks from this article, which means you need more matches.
A tool that’ll help you find and fix all the weaknesses in your dating profile. Whether it’s Tinder, Bumble, Hinge, or whatever.
Enjoy your new matches, bro.
For more tips, check out these articles:
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