What To Say On Tinder: 55+ Pick-Up Lines, Openers & Tips

You got a great Tinder match.

But your mind has no ideas except, “What to say on Tinder?

No problem. In this article, we’ll break down your whole conversation from start to date.

Whether you’re looking for conversation starters, or are in the midst of a Tinder conversation.

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What to say to your Tinder match: Understanding the basics

Let’s have a quick look at some common mistakes people make on Tinder.

Your primary goal should be to make your match feel attracted to you. And attraction is not a rational process. It’s a feeling.

However, most people tend to text very rationally. They ask informational questions about work, hobbies, and family. And then hope their match will spontaneously start liking them.  Maybe they make a joke every now and then, but that’s as crazy as it gets.

So, how do you make someone feel attracted to you? There are two aspects to this.

First, she wants to feel that she’s dating up instead of dating down. Unconsciously we’re rating people as either better than us or less than us on the dateability ladder. And in general, we want to date someone who we can look up to and feels like a total catch.

Dating up and down

And second, your match wants to experience a rollercoaster of emotions with you. A blizzard of fun instead of a desert of boring.

You want to show that:

  • You’re fun
  • You’re playful and flirty
  • You’re not needy
  • You’re not already fully bought in
  • You make her work for your attention

This means that you do not:

  • Ask boring questions
  • Compliment her all the time
  • Agree with everything she says
  • Send walls of text

Boring conversations vs good conversations

Use radical authenticity to decide what to say on Tinder

Now, as a guy you might ask: Why does it have to be so complex? Why can’t we just have a normal talk on a dating app?

Here’s your answer. As a guy you are already primarily attracted to her appearance. So basically you’re already open for a date after seeing her online dating profile and swiping right.

For a woman, however, attraction works differently. How you look is only a small part of it. But your behavior is the important part that attracts her. I won’t go into the biological reasons for this now, that’s too much for this article.

But imagine you’re talking to a woman you have never seen. You have no clue what she looks like. Assuming you are at least a bit critical, you’d also have to look at signals in what she says to decide if you would want to date her.

The core principle we teach at TextGod to become an attractive texter is  Radical Authenticity.

Let’s be honest. Right now you’re not your authentic self when you text. You’re different than with your friends. You’re more careful with what you say to try to please your match.

And that actually destroys your chances. Because you’ll be more boring and she will feel your neediness.

However, if you’re radically authentic, the most extreme version of yourself, it’s way more likely that she will absolutely love you.

This means:

  • You show your unique style of humor
  • You don’t filter yourself
  • You call her out on her ‘bullshit’
  • You don’t always agree with her
  • You text what and when you feel like
  • You don’t mind if she doesn’t like who you are

The following tips will give you practical advice and examples on what to say on Tinder.

Keep in mind how you can make them your own and how you can be radically authentic.

15 pick-up lines to say to a girl on Tinder + 3 Tinder message templates

Before we get into the meat of this article, I want to give you some quick copy-paste lines to say to a girl on Tinder or other dating apps.

Pick one of the next topics and you’ll give your Tinder match a great time.

To actually understand why they work and how to craft your own lines, continue reading.

1. What you’re doing right now

  • I’m eating a bacon lettuce tomato sandwich. Without the tomato, obviously.
  • Playing some Hearthstone behbehhhhhhh. You ever play video games?
  • About to read a book while I sip on a lovely glass of wine. You?

2. Food

  • Do you fold your pizza?
  • Nutella. Overrated or underrated?
  • What’s your favorite snack?

3. Movies & series

  • If I say top 5 movies of all time, what is the first one that comes to mind?
  • What series or movies didn’t live up to the hype for you?
  • Which series did you binge the hardest?

4. Her

  • If I could see your latest YouTube history, what would I see?
  • What do you wear when you’re home and not expecting company?
  • What’s one of your favorite smells?

5. Playful and unique topics

  • If you could have any creature as a pet, real or magical, what would it be?
  • What’s the last meme that made you belly laugh?
  • What movie gave you nightmares as a kid?

3 Templates to use when you don’t know what to say on Tinder

Strapped for time and want a quick no-nonsense answer to your question?

Watch my next video where I share 3 fill-in-the-blank templates to create your own pick-up lines to use on Tinder.

They’re reusable and they make attractive texting a whole lot easier.

Ok, time to dive deeper in the tips to follow.

What to say to start your Tinder conversation (27 Lines + 4 Tips)

Let’s first have a look at how to start your conversation with a girl.

Plenty of guys get good great matches, but get no reaction to their texts. Why? Because they send the first thing that comes to mind. Which is usually ‘Hey’ or one of its relatives.

Hi

How are you?

Yes, it’s pleasant. But it’s also about as fun as talking about the weather. To get reactions you need to be different. Even dumb and different can work. As you can see here in one of my conversations:

Whatever you choose to send to break the ice, remember this: An emotional flatline is disastrous for creating attraction.

Here’s 7 great examples of what to say to start your Tinder conversation:

  • I don’t usually give away compliments so easily, but you have great taste in men.
  • Sunday priorities: exercise, sleep, or aggressive mimosas?
  • If you were a fruit you’d be a fineapple. And if you were a vegetable, I’d visit you every day in the hospital.
  • If I were a T-rex, I’d try to hold you in my little arms and cry because I couldn’t resist your yummy smell and ate you.
  • Hey, [her name]! Two truths and a lie, let’s go! I’ve never been on a blind date, I have never been hospitalized, I graduated with high honors.
  • Alright, so what movie title describes your love life best?
  • How’s your Friday night going on a scale from single mug of tea to cocaine orgy?

The perfect opener

For an in-depth article on Tinder openers, check out this one:

Let’s look at some tips to write a great first message.

1. Use clickbait in your opening line

You won’t believe how well girls respond to this opener. But before I share the opener with you, let me explain the psychology behind making your first message irresistible. Because if you use my technique correctly, she’s almost compelled to reply.

Sounds good, right? The magic comes from the power of… clickbait!

You’re basically saying something so irresistible that she has to reply.

Use my free Tinder clickbait opener and see for yourself.

What can you expect if you click the link?

  1. My most effective Tinder opener.
  2. And a video with screenshot examples and 2 follow-up texts.

You can find it >HERE<.

2. Send a personalized and witty opener

This is without a doubt the most powerful Tinder opener of them all.

The personalized opener.

I’ll be honest with you, it’s not the easiest opener. It requires a decent amount of brainpower. But because it’s always relevant to your match, it has the highest success rate.

The cream of the crop opener involves three simple steps:

  1. Read her bio and study her photos.
  2. Pick one subject that stands out to you but isn’t obvious.
  3. Write it out in a playful way.

Let’s turn theory into practice. Imagine you run into a Tinder profile with this pic and bio:

What sticks out to me are: duckface, thick eyebrows, empty room, she likes superheroes, nipples that can cut diamonds.

The not so obvious subject: what this selfie says about her personality.

My Tinder opener (it’s not the best, but it was good enough!):

Absolutely STUNNING room decor

A tiny white rug. A table a meter away from the wall. And a plant on the floor where it can be used as a football

If your decorator was a superhero, he’d be called Inepto Man

Why did this work?

  1. It’s different from everybody else.
  2. It’s personal (the opener describes HER photo and doesn’t work on any other girl, only the angel you matched with).
  3. It ties into her bio (she likes superheroes).
  4. It’s a playful push (especially confident women like to be teased).

3. Send her a tried and tested icebreaker

My girlfriend and I tested the best Tinder icebreakers. 20 of them, to be exact. I said ’em and she rated ’em.

Check out this video:

For a whole list of great Tinder icebreakers, check out this article:

4. Send a personalized animated GIF

If you’re ever lost for words but want to text a new match anyway, I’ve got exactly what you’re looking for.

Send her an animated GIF.

But not any GIF. Especially not the GIFs that Tinder recommends. I’m looking at you ‘Hello Bear!’

This particular GIF is so played out, it doesn’t even give girls a chuckle. Instead, it makes her think, “Haven’t I already had this conversation?”

And the other recommended GIFs are no better. If you are going to send her a cute animation, you want to make sure she’s never seen it before.

So how do you know what GIF to choose? By making it relevant.

What do her photos and bio reveal about her? Does she like to watch Friends? Type ‘friends flirt’ in the little search bar to find a smooth talking Joey.

Does she like doggos? Search for ‘dog human’ and find funny animations of dogs dressed as people.

GIFs are a great way to make a good impression with little effort.

If you want to know more about GIFs, check out this article:

What to say during your Tinder conversation (9 Lines + 8 Tips)

1. Ask open questions

If you ever catch yourself asking her questions you don’t care about, just because you want to keep the conversation moving, this is for you.

Ask open questions.

Most men will see the texts of their matches shrink smaller and smaller. And after doing some crazy brain crunches, their best answer is usually a dull question.

Do you have any siblings?

No

Do you do any sports?

Sometimes

Are you going to unmatch me if I keep asking questions?

Yep

Closed questions are the breaks of any conversation. Ask too many and the convo will screech to a halt.

Why? Because your Tinder question doesn’t set her up for an interesting answer. They don’t build a connection and they don’t spark her emotions.

Keep your questions open. And link them to something you genuinely want to know about her.

2. Be playful

After this tip, you’ll never be boring again. Well, at least not by accident. Because once you have the skills, being fun or boring is a choice!

Here’s a simple way to be fun on Tinder: Misinterpret her texts.

Simply take whatever she says and change the meaning into something fun.

An example:

I had a good day

Some friends and I went out for coffee and shared a really big piece of cake

Here it comes, you ready?

I knew it!!! Size does matter after all!

It shows that you’re witty and playful. Plus, you’re hinting that you’re interested in her sexually.

You can almost do this with anything.

3. Set yourself up for fun

This is without a doubt the best way to inject fun into your Tinder conversations: Set yourself up.

Look, you can’t always predict how someone will respond. So even the BEST jokes can go unnoticed if she’s distracted somehow.

But you CAN fully control how you’ll respond. So if the conversation needs a little extra oomph, poke fun at your own texts.

Suppose you tried to flirt, but it came out horrible. Call yourself out:

lmao

That was my unga bunga brain trying to be flirty

Here’s another example. In this case, a client of mine gave a different and fun meaning to something he just said.

4. Throw in something flirty

This is a big reason why many girls on Tinder lose interest: You’re too nice.

Look, there’s nothing wrong with nice. As long as you’re a nice guy with a wiener in between his legs. Don’t forget: she’s not on Tinder because she wants to make friends.

So get a little flirty. Throw in a sexual comment every now and then! When you’re having a good time and she makes you laugh:

Haha you’re funny. Shame I’m out of your league though 😉

When she’s into the same quirky stuff as you:

Omfg. Put a ring on my finger already!

When she says the wrong thing:

That’s a shame. I was just starting to like you a little and now I have to hit the unmatch button 😉

5. Lead the conversation to fun

This insight instantly improved all my Tinder conversations.

Not too long ago, a girl mentioned to me that she had the BEST conversation on Tinder. “It’s just so funny!”, she said. Curious as I am, I asked her if I could read it.

So she took out her phone and showed me. And she wasn’t exaggerating, the conversation was pretty hilarious. Almost as good as mine. #behumble

We were scrolling through her Tinder convo from top to bottom and she added:

“Usually my texts are super boring.”

“But when a guy knows how to make it easy for me to reply. I can be funny too!”

*mind blown*

Here’s a screenshot of a playful convo that illustrates the power of leading.

What’s important is the line, “Screw dating. Let’s escape on a yacht headed for the sunset and live the bohemian lifestyle.”

Not only does she respond, she beefs up the fantasy. That’s when you know she’s bought into the conversation. Make your texts easy to respond to.

6. Be a challenge

Here’s how to make her excited about texting you: Be a challenge. Why?

Let me answer that with another question, have you ever thought about why girls on Tinder sometimes grow distant?

9/10 times it’s because she feels she already has you. And if she hasn’t worked enough to make you hers, she doesn’t really care. You feel cheap. Replaceable.

Here’s how you become irreplaceable to her:

Be a source of good emotions for her + show her that she needs to put in effort to keep you around.

How do you know if you’re doing a good job? If she’s ecstatic when you tell her something nice. Like so:

Her reaction may not seem like much. But I can guarantee you that my one compliment made her whole day.

7. Create a special bond

How to make her crazy excited to meet you: Dig deep and strike common ground.

The straightforward way to build a connection is to focus on interests. Think back to the last time a girl loved the same band or movie that you did.

My favorite movie of all time is Jurassic Park

OMG! Mine too! I had it on VHS when I was a kid and would watch it 3 times in a row.

Here’s an example of me sharing a couple of songs with a girl. My gift hits so close to home she’s shocked.

It’s her favorite song and she can’t believe I understand her taste in music so well. Without even telling me, I knew what she loved.

You can bet your ass she felt deeply connected to me. Now, music is still a pretty superficial interest. It doesn’t reveal a whole lot about her. But can you imagine how close she’d feel to me if we had a similar upbringing?

If we both had an older sibling who always kicked our butts? Or if we both felt like angsty teens in high school? Precisely.

If you want to build a deep connection, share interests and stories about yourself that you think will resonate with her. If your stories hit their mark, she’ll grow crazy about you.

8. Show her you have standards

Follow this tip’s wisdom and you’ll never be tossed in the friendzone again. It can be a  traumatizing experience when she texts you after the date with:

“Hey. You know… I had a good time. But I’m not sure if we’re a fit. Let’s just be friends.”

But there’s a lesson to be learned from this emotional uppercut. Did you know that women are RARELY on the receiving end of the friendzone sucker punch?

Why do you think that is? Because men only think one thing:

She looks sexy. So I’m interested.
The men of the world

In other words, men have horrible standards. We’re too easily swayed by her jiggly body parts.

What if the roles were reversed? What if women wanted to get us badly, and we kept them at arm’s length?

It sounds too good to be true, right? But it doesn’t have to be a fantasy! Here’s how you make it a reality:

Show her that you’re not a sucker for her looks by actually having standards.

If she notices that you’re looking for something and that you won’t just fall for any girl, SHE will want to be the one you pick.

How to ask her out on Tinder (2 Lines + 3 Tips)

1. Advance to the next step on a high note

Have a quick look at this conversation:

Mr. Smiles starts the convo by giving his match a less than stellar multiple-choice question. So it’s no surprise she chooses option two: yeet him into the friendzone.

But our Tinder bro doesn’t go down without a fight. He sets her up for another game. She bites and gives him another chance of sweeping her off her feet.

But then he makes the king of all mistakes: He asks her if she’s down for a date with him this weekend on a LOW note. 🤔

She didn’t seem at all like she was having a good time with him. And then he pressed his luck anyway, despite the incredibly low odds of success. Rookie mistake.

You only take it to the next level when she’s clearly having a good time.

Like when she’s replying quickly, she’s laughing and she’s asking questions.

Follow that principle and your date proposals will rarely get rejected.

2. Recognize when she likes you

If you know when she likes you, you’ll never get rejected again. But how do you tell?

Let’s begin with an actual example from my phone. Is she interested or not?

Super mega crazy interested, right?

But most signals women give are much more subtle.

It can be as little as using a few extra letters.

A few extra emojis. Or a quick burst of texts. Even the timing of her messages can reveal she’s interested.

If she responds instantly, it’s likely to mean she can’t wait to read your next reply.

Does she take forever? Then she’s probably not that eager to see what you have to say.

As with any guidelines, they aren’t set in stone. If your match always uses lots of emojis, instantly replies, and talks in short salvos, she may not necessarily be into you.

But more often than not, these signs are indicators that she likes you.

Use your common sense and you’ll probably be on the mark.

3. Ask her out without uncertainty

There is one symbol that’s sabotaging your Tinder conversations. If you stop using it, you will instantly be more attractive.

The question mark.

???

It’s only natural you have doubts about my claims. So let’s put it to the test.

Compare the next two sentences. And tell me which seems more confident.

Hey, what are you up to do this weekend? I’m going to go sailing, do you want to join?

Hey, I’m going to go sailing this weekend. You should join.

The second sentence sounds way more confident, right? Do you want to know why? Because it screams certainty.

If I paraphrase, it says:

“I’m out doing cool shit, G. You should come unless you want to miss out on the event of a lifetime.”

Convinced of how the question mark saps your power?

Good. Now stop using it and watch your Tinder success rise.

For more tips on asking a girl out, check out this article:

What to text her after the date (5 Tips)

If you follow the TextGod tips, you’ll eventually find yourself inside a cozy café with your Tinder match.

You sit next to each other. You joke around. Find out what you have in common. Discover she once killed her pet turtle at age five by accidentally stepping on it.

Great! You’re getting along better than expected. And at the end of the night you kiss goodbye.

You return home and can’t believe how well your Tinder date went. Filled with thoughts of how yummy her lips felt, you wonder when you’ll see her again.

Suddenly your mood takes a turn for the worst. “What comes now?!”, you think to yourself?

“Should I text her or should I wait for her to shoot me a message?”

“And if it’s the man’s job to text first, should I do it now or tomorrow?”

Excellent questions, buddy. And you’re not the first to think of them.

So I made you a guide on what to text after the date. You can find it here:

For more on texting after the first date, check this out:

What to text to revive a dead convo (2 Lines)

You’ll never find yourself struggling to bring a dying conversation back from the dead after applying the next bit of TextGod wisdom.

Maybe you sent her a message but didn’t get a reply. You’re no stranger to Tinder, so you give her plenty of time to text back. One day goes by. *crickets* Two days. Three. *still crickets*

Let me help you grab her attention. One of my favorite ways of resurrecting a dead Tinder convo is by calling out the elephant in the room in a fun way.

Let me give you two examples. Starting with the missing person report.

Sidenote: this only works if you have enough personal info about her. For example:

Missing: scuba diving instructor

Loves: mountain climbing

Buys super expensive handbags even though she won’t admit it

Please return whole to [your name]

Do you see the beauty of the report?

It’s funny. And you’re clearly not begging for a response. That would be breaking one of my 19 texting rules.

If the report is too much work, or you don’t have enough info, use a meme. One of the latest faves is the following:

And here it is in action so you know I’m not messing about.

If you want to know more about what to do if she doesn’t text back, check out this article:

Great, now you have all the knowledge to become a legendary TextGod yourself.

If you want a head start, I recommend you check out my free goodies below.

Blessings,
Louis Farfields

 

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