I know why you’re here.
You swiped a cute guy on Tinder.
Got a match.
And want to be untraditional: you want to send him the first text.
But what if you don’t get a reply?
Don’t worry! You’re about to get 15 Tinder openers for women he can’t resist.
Plus, you’ll discover:
- Why your Tinder openers didn’t get a reply
- The best opener that’ll guarantee a response
- How to make a guy like you with the first text
- The most common opener mistakes most women make
- How to text him WITHOUT giving away your power
What the heck is an opener?
Some kind of corkscrew?
“Do you really think I don’t know what an opener is, Louis? TextGod? More like LameGod…”
The only reason I’m being so patronizing is because I’ve worked with several female clients, of which some ALWAYS sent their Tinder matches ‘Hi’ after matching.
As you can see, even Ernie feels embarrassed for them.
With openers like ‘Hi’, you instantly get launched into the category of ‘generic and boring’.
“Louis! I’m just saying hello! Is that really that bad?”
Look, don’t get me wrong. I encourage all women to occasionally take the initiative and send the first text.
Despite what the mainstream narrative dictates, women have far more power to actively shape their love lives.
But if you use it to tell your Tinder crush ‘Hi’, you throw all that power away.
So straighten up your back and get comfortable.
Because you’re about to learn all there is about the wonderful world of Tinder openers.
The 3 different types of men on Tinder
If you’re like most women, you probably think the following:
“Yes! It’s a match… He already likes me, hehe.”
Which is where you’re…
In at least, 2 out of 3 situations.
You see, every man who matches you on Tinder falls into one of the next categories:
- He doesn’t like you
- He’s interested in you (no more than that)
- He likes you
You’re probably wondering, “Why would a guy swipe me right if he doesn’t like me?”
Good question, my dear reader.
Here’s your answer:
Because some men will swipe EVERYTHING right, and sort their matches later.
So it could mean you matched with a guy, who never gave your profile a serious look-over.
In that case, you could send the best opener in the galaxy, and STILL not get a response. Just because he isn’t into you.
By the way, do you have the feeling you’re a little light on matches?
When your opener makes a difference
The first time your opener has the power to make a difference is…
When you’re dealing with a guy who is at least interested in you.
Which is more than fine.
Remember, he only has your photos and profile text to give him an idea of who you are.
So it’s perfectly normal that he doesn’t know how wonderful of a person you are in real life.
Proving that you’re a wonderful person is your job—not your dating profile.
And your Tinder opener is your first way to prove your worth.
Depending on what text you send, you may instantly earn a promotion into the ‘I like her’-category.
More on that later.
First, some more about the third group of men you’ll match on Tinder:
The men who already like you.
It doesn’t matter what opener you send these guys, because they’re already sold on chatting with you.
That said, I want you to have the best results imaginable.
Which is why I’m about to give you Tinder openers that are so good, that he’ll go from simply liking you, to crushing on you.
All because you’re so much more fun than all the other girls in his inbox.
Let’s get to the good stuff.
If this is you, your Tinder results are doomed
You can easily separate yourself from the masses by…
Taking the initiative and sending the first text.
For some reason, probably a mix of social expectations and ego, most women wait for a man to break the ice.
Which is exactly why you’ll make a man’s day if he sees that you texted him first.
Ladies, I want you to realize this:
Men feel hugely flattered when a woman takes the initiative.
As long as you give him the opportunity to take over the reins and seduce you, after you send the first text.
All the above does NOT mean that every first text is a guaranteed way to win him over.
In fact, some first texts are so bad that he’ll actually get turned off.
Which isn’t a problem if he already liked you. But if he was only interested…
You may have killed all the attraction he felt for you in a single text.
So first impressions count!
Let’s check out how most women like to break the ice.
Starting with “Oh no…” all the way up to “Haha, I LOVE THIS GIRL!”
Although you could skip to the best openers, I advise against it.
The better you know what garbage your Tinder rivals are texting, the easier you can stand out and make yourself look good.
#1-2: The most used Tinder openers by women
Without a doubt, the most used ice breaker by women is…
And all its variations.
Which is better than nothing.
Especially if it’s been three days since you got the match and the conversation hasn’t started.
But, check my Tinder inbox…
Hey is the most standard and dull text you can send.
Which makes it all the more crazy that it’s the most used opener on Tinder!
Some women have the sense to spruce it up a little with an emoji.
Which already adds a bit more flavor. Plus, it’s more feminine.
But again, it’s nothing special.
Do you see why I think the advice of ‘just tell her hi’ is horse shit?
It’s the most used line on Tinder… EVER.
Which is terrible, since texting is about showing off your personality as best you can!
Being the same as the rest isn’t you.
How to get him excited with your Tinder opener
The easiest way to set yourself up for success with your Tinder match is to…
Trigger positive emotions.
Which is easier than you think.
Most women send texts that are more mellow than a crate of Valium.
So with a little imagination, you’ll already have a text that’ll get guys hooked on you.
And when I say ‘little’ I mean LITTLE.
I’m talking about openers such as…
#3: The compliment
Most men aren’t used to receiving compliments from women.
So when they do, they’ll feel flattered.
And it doesn’t have to be a fancy compliment.
Just something as simple as:
Could work wonders.
It’s ever so slightly different than what most women send.
And that’s all you need…
What if the man you matched is a stud who has his pick of the litter?
What does his inbox look like?
Well, I have a few clients who were first in line when the Big Man was handing out good genes.
And they receive boatloads of texts like these:
So as you can see, even compliments are an over-used strategy.
Perhaps you’ve also had your fair share of compliments on your looks.
So please consider: how special do you feel when you get these superficial compliments?
Do you feel flattered? Or are you perhaps a little disappointed?
Exactly. Hearing it for the 100th time is a lot less special than the first.
And if you want to trigger positive emotions, you must make him feel special.
Otherwise you’ll be Tinder match #102,300.
Which brings us to the question:
How do make him feel special?
Found out in the next tip.
#4: How to make him feel special
A wise man once said:
Everyone loves to hear their name.
Which is why it’s smart to…
Use their name in your first text!
Which gives you something like this:
Whenever I open my Tinder inbox and go through my messages, my eyes always lock in on texts with my name.
Just be sure to spell his name right.
I never thought my name was difficult to spell until I got on Tinder.
The ways people can butcher ‘Louis’ is astounding.
So get it right, unless you’re fine looking silly.
We’ve gone over 4 different openers and have arrived in the ‘okay’ category of Tinder icebreakers.
The above openers are more than enough to make a man feel special who only gets a couple of matches a week.
But what if he gets a lot of attention from women?
Then you’d better stay away from these lazy texts.
And step up your game with…
#5: The scientific opener
Perhaps a bit of a misnomer.
Because the next opener really doesn’t require much brain power or a lab coat.
But linking science to Tinder openers does drive home my point.
Even when I tell you to:
Think about anything BUT science.
Your mind’s eye probably saw all sorts of images like:
Even when you DON’T want to think of something, your brain beats you to it and brings up all all sorts of related images.
And that’s my point.
Our brain sees images, not words.
When you think of an ‘apple’, your brain doesn’t show you a typed out image of ‘A P P L E’.
What does any of this have to do with Tinder openers?
Well, knowing that our brain thinks in images.
What do you think stands out more?
Right, the waving lady emoji.
Which is your 5th Tinder opener.
Pick the emoji that most looks like you and wave at your Tinder match.
“Really, Louis? That’s better than ‘Hey’?”
Well, it is if you get a little creative with it.
And if you really want to stand out, tell a story:
Now, I wouldn’t be Louis if I was content with this opener.
We can dial it up even more.
Which brings me to…
#6: A great way to show off your personality
As you probably know, GIFs are moving images that you can send by hitting the blue button next to your chat window.
Which should show you something like this:
You can enter any word you like and find a related GIF.
Which is wonderful if you remember that texting is all about…
Showing off your personality.
What’s the first thing you’d want him to know about you?
Your love for Harry Potter?
That you’re a science geek?
Or that you’re just happy to match him?
Not only can you find a GIF for almost every occasion, but GIFs are actually very rare to get as a guy.
Me and my clients rarely get them, unless we start sending them first.
Which is why I love it when a girl sends me a GIF.
Especially if it strikes the right mix between flattery and funny.
If you have little experience with sending GIFS, I recommend you stick to:
- Emotions (like ‘happy’, ‘excited’)
- Adjectives (like ‘flirty’, ‘hot’)
- Familiar phrases (‘it’s a match’).
I’d show you a couple, but GIFS eat up bandwidth and I want to keep my smartphone fans happy.
Anyway, by using ‘real world’ visuals, you’re much more likely to trigger emotions.
Especially if you send him a GIF that ties into his interests.
Which reminds me of the next opener…
#7: Keep it relevant
Keep what relevant?
Does your Tinder match’s bio say he loves The Office or some other show or film?
Type it into Tinder’s GIF archive and pick the most flirty clip of the bunch.
If a girl would open me with a GIF of Archer or Eastbound & Down, she’d instantly gain 5 sexy points.
And you don’t want to miss out on those.
So pay attention to any clues about his interests.
Which includes looking at the posters or book covers in the background of his photos.
His interests are the way to his heart.
#8: The buddy opener
Being a woman, I’ve sure you’ve at least once heard this line in real life or online:
“Hey, don’t I know you from somewhere?”
Which 9/10 times is an obvious lie.
So why is that line a favorite among men?
Because it dances around a woman’s guard.
‘Don’t I know you from somewhere’ implies you already have a history.
And we’re more friendly to people we know.
So that line isn’t a bad idea.
Which is why you’re going to steal it.
Men aren’t used to women doing the ‘don’t I know you’-spiel, so the curiosity will drive him insane.
His mind: “We met before???”
Here’s how you set it up:
It doesn’t matter what he replies.
Because you’ll say the same thing regardless of his answer.
A super dry historical fact.
By now he gets it’s a joke.
And he can’t believe he matched a girl with a good sense of humor.
#9: The opener he can’t resist
It’s sad but true…
Most men have a boring Tinder profile.
Student, music, football
Love coffee, music and meeting new people
Which really doesn’t help you come up with an emotionally stimulating opener.
Because I’ve got just the thing.
You know, just like the stuff you see on YouTube:
- Girl Didn’t Know She Was Being Filmed, So She Did This
- (Insert famous person) Struggle With Acne And Self Confidence
- 5 Steps To Make Him Fall In Love With you
If you’re like most people, at least one of these titles made you curious.
Curious enough to make you want to see the video.
We can apply the same technique to Tinder openers.
Which may sound like a lot of work if you’re not a copywriter.
“Hmmm… What kind of clickbait would work on CuteGuy69???”
But here’s the thing…
I’ve already done all the work for you.
The irresistible clickbait opener is finished and ready for action.
Here’s a list of great Hinge openers.
If you check it out now, you also get a video of me showing how I use the Clickbait Opener.
Plus, how I reel in my matches and continue the conversation.
Just hit the link and get the Tinder reply you’re waiting for.
#10: Show that you care
As said earlier, most men have a pretty lame bio.
But more often than not, it does give you some information.
Information that you can turn into a fun Tinder text he’d love to receive.
Suppose he has the classic Tinder grocery list bio:
Pilot. Yoga. Coffee.
That brevity of that bio may make you frustrated.
“Ugh… Why do guys always make it so difficult to break the ice!”
But those three words honestly give you enough to come up with a good Tinder opener.
Simply imagine a pilot doing yoga in a cockpit while drinking coffee.
Pretty funny image, right?
Let’s turn it into an opener.
It may not seem impressive.
But I can bet you anything he’d LOVE to get that text.
- It’s original (no girl has probably said anything remotely close to that)
- It’s relevant
- You texted him first
By the way, it’s not just men that are good at writing boring bios.
Women have a knack for it too.
What does your bio say?
If it’s filled with generalities, you’re not doing much better.
Describing yourself with vague and general labels that apply to a lot of people is called the Barnum effect.
And is HURTING your matches.
To know what else is hurting your matches, check out this article.
So if you want to write an opener he loves, use his bio.
#11: A dilemma he can’t refuse
Another Tinder opener I’d wish more women would use:
The dilemma opener.
The premise is simple:
You give your Tinder match two options, of which he HAS to choose one.
Because of their silly nature, dilemma’s always set off the conversation to a good start.
Instead of a logical exchange of information, you dive right into the good stuff.
Here are a few more dilemmas:
- You’re always followed by 5 mariachis OR you have to high five EVERY person you see
- You’re immortal (but your family and friends are not) OR the army chases you for the rest of your life because they want to do experiments on you
- You always have a swarm of flies circling your head OR you always have to pull around a trash bin
- You only need 3 hours of sleep a night OR you get a free visit to the Moon
Invent more yourself, or simply use your friend Google to find more.
#12: The onion opener
Do you know The Onion?
It’s a media company that writes hilarious fake news.
With articles as:
- Black guy asks nation for change (about Obama)
- Study Reveals: Babies Are Stupid
- Winner Didn’t Even Know It Was A Pie-Eating Contest
And hilarious videos like brain-dead teen:
Maybe it’s not quite up your alley.
But the beautiful thing is…
This type of humor hits us harder than a freight train.
(That’s a good thing.)
So if you’re ever lost for openers, fire up The Onion website, or check out their YouTube channel.
And pick your favorite news item.
Then send him a text like:
To which he’ll obviously respond:
At which point you’ll hit him with:
And a link to the youtube video.
Or any other article that stands out to you.
#13: And we’re off
Perhaps you find some of the previous openers too try-hard.
Which is understandable.
You don’t want to show too much interest and give away your power.
So how do you take the initiative and send a low-investment, but flattering first text?
Which tells him all he needs to know:
“We matched, let’s see where this leads us.”
More importantly, he’ll be flattered that you took the initiative.
And will more likely put in some extra effort to sweep you off your feet.
#14: The calculating opener
Here comes a favorite of another dating coach who lives in the Netherlands:
Which works wonders for him.
And will most likely work wonders for you.
The beauty of this opener?
It’s super easy.
First, you open up Tinder’s GIF archive and enter ‘math’.
Where you’ll be looking for this image:
Once you’ve found it, you hit send and instantly follow up with:
The line ties into every Tinder user’s greatest worry:
“What the fuark should I open with?”
(Which is exactly why you’re reading this article, lol.)
So you’re calling out the elephant in the room, which he’ll be sure to appreciate.
Now onto the final and BEST opener of them all.
#15: The original opener
I know what you’re thinking:
“Dude, if I was original, I wouldn’t be here looking for Tinder openers!”
Well, I honestly think you’re more original than you give yourself credit for.
And I’m going to prove it to you
The most powerful opener of all checks three boxes:
- It’s original (he’s not seen it before)
- It’s relevant (it’s about the subject he cares about most in life… HIM)
- It’s emotionally stimulating (it triggers a whirlwind of emotions)
And I’m going to teach you how to do all three, using the next steps:
- You look at his bio and photos
- You observe what stands out most
- You wrap that observation into an icebreaker
IMPORTANT: Since a guy doesn’t expect to be opened by a woman in the first place, you really don’t need to overthink what you say. He’ll be blown away that you opened him with something that ties into his profile.
Let me give you some ideas of what I mean.
Suppose the guy is hulking out of every outfit. Which is easy to spot.
You could text him:
Which he’ll obviously recognize as a joke, because he’s probably working on his guns every day.
Note: Do not use the above Tinder opener unless he’s a meathead, or else he’ll think you’re insulting him.
Maybe he has a photo with a guitar in the background.
Challenge him a little:
Maybe 4/5 photos are of him traveling the world.
To which you could say:
Get the idea?
Sending an original opener is really not as difficult as you think.
And men appreciate a little tease.
Anyway, that’s pretty much all you need to know on Tinder Openers.
Enjoy your new conversations.
And don’t forget to grab the Clickbait Opener. Simply scroll down and click the gold button.
For more tips, check out these articles:
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