You’re having no luck on Tinder, Bumble, or other dating apps.
With the odds stacked against you, it can seem almost impossible to make these apps work.
However, there are many guys just like you who are having success on Tinder and other dating apps.
I know, since it’s my job to help regular guys have amazing dating lives.
So let’s have a look at the reasons why you’re not nailing it yet.In this article:More...
Why you have no luck on dating apps – 3 Fundamental principles
Before we dive into the specifics, you need to know what is and isn’t attractive.
That’s why I’m going to share 3 fundamental principles that largely decide your luck on dating apps. With these in mind, it becomes way easier to tackle why dating apps like Tinder are not working for you now.
The 3 principles put together form my TextGod Formula. And it’s what leads anyone to success on dating apps: Attraction, Trust, and Investment.
1. You’re not building attraction the right way
Let me tackle one big misconception right now: your looks are only a part of what makes her feel attracted. There are far more factors that decide how much she’s into you.
Other crucial components of attraction are:
- Your vibe. Will she enjoy hanging out with you?
- Your ‘value’. Are you more likely to lift her up or pull her down?
- Your life. Does it look exciting to her?
- Your seduction skills. Can you arouse and seduce her without seeming like a creep?
- And more…
Are you demonstrating enough of these signs in your profile and conversations?
Important: Just letting you know I am currently letting guys use my Profile Checklist for free. It's a simple fill-in-the-blanks code that shows you what to change about your profile. It's the first step to getting all the matches you want. Get it here for free.
2. You’re not building trust (Or you’re building too much!)
Sure, attraction does most of the heavy lifting.
But it’s important, especially to women, that you’re not some weird guy that might hurt her. Women are typically more vulnerable than men. And she has to seriously consider if it’s safe to meet up.
Plus, she needs to know if you’re not going to make things awkward. So she’s also checking to see if you can treat her right.
Are you not building trust? Then she won’t meet up.
However, a lot of guys actually build too much trust. They barely build attraction but only focus on having pleasant conversations. The result? You end up in the friendzone.
3. You’re investing too much
In every interaction, there’s always an unconscious battle:
Who is dating up, and who is dating down?
Which of you is the bigger “prize” that the other chases?
Nobody wants to date someone who’s much lower on the scale of attractiveness. Someone who has way less dating market value.
So we all the time subconsciously look for signals that someone is on our level or higher.
One of the biggest signs that reveals someone’s value? How much they invest in you.
The more a suitor invests, the harder they’re trying to win you over. Why all the effort? Probably because they don’t feel like their ‘normal’ self is good enough for you.
Put simply, someone who feels like your equal won’t try too hard to seduce you.
IMPORTANT: She’s not just looking at your conversation to see if you’re a try-hard. Also your profile.
Let’s dive into the details, and see how this all plays out.
Reasons why you’re not getting matches
1. Your profile pictures aren’t conveying your personality
The first reason why you’re not getting any matches is because your profile pictures are suboptimal.
Your profile pictures have 2 jobs:
- Showing off your looks.
- Showing how fun and awesome it is to hang out with you.
Most guys have some plain and boring pictures of themselves.
Even if they look relatively good, it doesn’t tell her anything about your personality and life.
So make sure to have pictures of you in different settings. Being social, having fun, and enjoying your hobbies.
The pictures you use to show off your looks should be top-quality. Use a photographer who knows how to shoot attractive photos.
For more details on the perfect profile pictures, check out this article:
2. You put too much effort into your profile and bio
Another reason you’re not having any luck at getting matches is that you put too much effort into your profile and bio.
Too much? Yes, too much.
Remember investment? If someone wrote a long bio, used all their picture slots, and for example used a lot of prompts on their dating profile, what does that say?
It means you’re trying too hard. You’re investing too much. Which indicates that your dating market value must be low.
3. Your bio is too serious and not original
Remember you’re trying to convey your personality. You want her to feel something when she checks out your profile.
A serious factual bio doesn’t do that. And trying to be funny by copying an over-used bio isn’t optimal either.
Try to be witty and original in your bio.
At TextGod we promote Radical Authenticity: Be yourself to the extreme. You’ll be surprised how attractive that is.
For more on writing the perfect online dating or Tinder bio, read this article:
4. Your location and radius are not optimal
If you’re in a small town or have your radius quite small, you might simply not have many options.
Try making your radius bigger, or changing your location to a nearby city for example.
Depending on the app you can change your location. With Tinder, it’s possible for example using Tinder Passport. A premium option.
5. You’re too critical who you swipe right
Another painful reason why you have no luck with dating apps is that you’re too critical.
If you’re just an average Joe and you only like the hottest girls, you’re bound to never get matches.
Luckily there is a lot you can do to pimp your profile. But stay realistic. You might not be able to seduce every Victoria’s Secret model. 😉
6. You’ve annoyed the algorithms
Every app works slightly differently. But one thing they have in common is that they want to keep their users happy.
So the algorithms that determine who you see (and who sees you!) change depending on your behavior.
For example. If you’re swiping everyone right, chances are that Tinder’s robots are hiding you from the most desirable women.
Because you’re acting like you have absolutely zero standards. And that’s typically not the type of person women want to date.
The most important thing to remember is: don’t try to game the app. There are no shortcuts to getting good results.
Reasons why your conversations lead nowhere
1. Your opening lines are too plain and boring
You only have one chance for a first impression. So why do most guys open with different variations of “Hey, what’s up”?
She’s heard it a gajillion times. So it’ll likely make her want to hit the eject button.
Your opening line is your first chance to make her smile and giggle.
So try to be original, funny, and flirty.
Take a look at her profile, look for something that stands out, and make a witty comment about it.
Check out this article to learn more about good opening lines:
2. You’re being too friendly or serious
This is one of the most common reasons why guys have no luck on Tinder.
Most guys think something along the lines of:
“If I’m kind and understanding enough and find things we have in common, she’ll start to like me at some point.”
But that’s not how seduction works. An essential element of the TextGod formula revolves around building attraction.
What you’re doing by being friendly is just building connection and trust.
So yes, you’re strengthening your bond. Which seems like a sign things are going well… until you find out that you’ve actually become good friends. Yep, focusing on connection leads to the friend zone.
To seduce her, she needs to feel sexually attracted to you. And you do that by flirting and teasing.
In short: don’t just seek connection, also playfully push her away a little bit. If you don’t do that, you’re not building attraction.
For more info on flirting, check out this article:
3. You’re being too needy
Now we’re going back to how much you invest. A lot of guys have no success at Tinder or other dating apps because they invest way more than their match.
- They write longer messages.
- They double-text more.
- They respond quicker than her.
- They like everything she says.
Remember, you’re trying to build attraction. And if you invest too much, it shows her you’re needy. And therefore probably not that popular with the ladies.
Think about it.
The harder you need to impress someone, the less awesome you clearly feel inside. Because if you felt like the man, you’d be fine if some random girl didn’t like you back.
You’re still amazeballs without her validation. Right?
Check out this article for tips on dealing with low self-esteem:
4. You’re coming off too strong
Now we’re going to the other extreme. You’re hitting on her too hard.
Every now and then you need to slow it down and build some trust and connection.
Otherwise, she won’t feel any trust that you’re a normal guy who respects her boundaries.
It’s important to show you’re emotionally intelligent and mature.
In the end, everyone can have some level of success on dating apps. It starts with understanding what you’re doing wrong. Because it’s easier to prevent mistakes than to fix them.
Especially when it comes to getting more Tinder matches. Things get a little more difficult over text though.
If you’re inexperienced, your conversations probably won’t go that smoothly from the start. You’ll need some practice. Or…
…you need my most powerful lines and texting techniques.
Hit the big button below and you’ll get my best lines to get you out of a jam. And how to get even the most beautiful women hooked on your texts.
And don't forget your download below ;)