7 Signs Someone Hates Or Dislikes You Over Text

Something seems off in the chat conversation. And you start to wonder: Do they hate me?

In this article, you’ll discover the most important signs that someone hates you over text.

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Hate is a big word

Of course, you prefer for someone to absolutely adore you. And if you have a romantic interest, this is probably what you want.

Hate is the direct opposite. However, the world isn’t black and white. There’s a whole world between loving and hating someone.

Such as:

  • Love
  • Like
  • Ambivalent
  • Dislike
  • Hate

And everything in between.

So in this article, I will focus mainly on the question, “Does this person like or dislike you?”

The more signs you recognize and the more intense these signs expose themselves, the more she probably dislikes you or even hates you.

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Why we hate people

To hate someone is a very strong feeling. It doesn’t just occur out of nowhere, just because we don’t like that person.

To get someone to hate you, you must have done something quite extreme.

  • You did something so absolutely terrible that they changed their feelings out of the blue.
  • You pressed someone’s buttons the wrong way for so long that the person simply can’t stand you anymore.
  • They’ve come to see you as someone with such different behaviors or values (even opposite to theirs) that they basically now see you as an enemy.

It means you’re repulsed by someone. You can’t identify at all with them anymore. All your empathy for that person is gone.

Once someone hates you, it’s almost impossible to recover from that.

It’s a judgment of your character that is hard to counter. Simply because people are always trying to find proof for their views instead of counter-arguments.

Chances are someone doesn’t really hate you. They just dislike you. Or are fed up with you. Or in the case of a romantic situation: They’re just not into you.

Let’s look at some signs someone dislikes you or even hates you.

1. They always make you wait for hours or days

Look, we’ve all been there. We’re texting someone. We’re excited to hear from them. But they take forever to answer.

Is that a sign someone hates you? No. Not even close. Busy people lead busy lives.

But if someone never texts back in the moment? That’s a little weird.

Because if you like someone, perhaps even have a little crush, getting a text from them is fun. And it makes you want to answer right away, just to see what they’ll send next.

Are you always waiting hours or even days for a response? The person on the other end may not be interested in you.

How do you get her interested in you? By applying 24 tips you can find here.

Disinterest, however, is not quite the same as hate. For hate, we have to see a bunch of signs. Otherwise, we can’t be sure.

So let’s move on to the next sign she may ‘hate’ you over text.

2. They never text as much as you do

Another big sign someone is not that into you is if they rarely invest in the conversation.

The majority of texts are from you. If someone likes you, they would want to engage and invest.

If they are not that into you, but don’t dislike you either, they would at least respond in a friendly way now and then.

If they don’t even do that, but rather respond emotionlessly, it’s a sign they are starting to dislike you.

How To Tell If Someone Hates You Over Text

Want to know why she’s sending you such short texts? Click here for an article that gives you 9 reasons why girls send short messages.

3. They always text at the same time

If your crush or text buddy ALWAYS comes back to you at the same time, something is up.

Sure, they could be living some kind of digital minimalism lifestyle that has them checking their phone at set times.

But even the most disciplined people can’t keep that up indefinitely. Eventually, they’ll succumb to their animal urges and see if they have any messages from their favorite people.

But does your special someone ALWAYS text back to you at the same time? I’m talking at least two weeks. They’re probably not really digging you and are just replying out of politeness.

IMPORTANT: If these specifically timed texts are long and many, it’s NOT a sign of hate or disinterest.

Sending several long-winded texts at a time is a clear sign of investment. Not hate.

4. They avoid you in real life

A MUCH better and clear sign someone hates or dislikes you is how they behave in real life.

Do they have a blank expression whenever you lock eyes? Do they look uninterested while talking to you? Or do they avoid you at all costs?

Has their real life behavior towards you changed for the worse?

“Ehh… I’ve never met this person before.”

Well that’s a HUGE red flag. If you’re already having thoughts that the person you’re chatting with hates you and you’ve never met… it’s probably best to call it quits.

Why would you be interested in a person that you’ve never seen and who is being distant over text?

If you’re getting vibes someone hates you OVER TEXT and you’ve never seen them, forget about them. Seriously.

5. They only talk about themselves and show little empathy

Does the person you’re thinking about love to talk about how awesome she is? Does she only talk about herself, what she does, and her achievements?

A person who’s actually interested in you shows that they’re impressed by YOU.

Does the person you’re texting with ever seem fascinated with your life and achievements?

That’s a genuine expression that they like you.

Does that never happen?

That’s likely a sign of disinterest.

6. They never have time for a call or meet-up

Someone who is super into you will make time even when it’s inconvenient.

That may not be a day. Heck, it may not even be an hour.

But if they’ll cobble together any spare moments they have to come and see you, that’s a clear sign of interest.

The opposite is also true. If someone can’t ever seem to have a spare moment to PICK UP A PHONE and talk to you for 60 seconds, that’s likely a sign she doesn’t like you.

Still not sure if someone hates you over text?

The next tip will settle it for you.

7. They show active disinterest or passive aggression

If all the previous signs still left you doubting what your crush or friend was thinking of you… these signs will give you the clarity you need.

Someone who doesn’t like you will send you a combination of the next signs and texts.

Let’s dive into it.

The EASIEST sign of them all, although not everyone is bold enough to send it, is a variation of these three messages:

I don’t like you like that

A more common text, that’s almost as direct is:

I think we’re better off as friends

Or the tried and true:

I’m not really feeling this

Haven’t ever got one of those?

There may still be some hope. Or the person on the other end is just too polite to turn you down.

Most people will likely be more indirect and show their disinterest by being curt.

Suppose you send three long-ish texts and she sends you one of these:





All these texts say, “Whatever I don’t care.”

Does the person send these texts after waiting for HOURS or even DAYS? Then she definitely doesn’t give two shits about you (right now).

Holy Tip:

While I don’t want to give you false hope, I also don’t want to give you false information.

If someone you’re into makes you wait forever and sends you short texts… it is POSSIBLE that she’s just going through a tough time.

Perhaps family issues, a bout of depression, or she accidentally stepped on her pet turtle.

Yet she’s still texting you. Which could very well be a genuine sign of interest.

I once knew a girl who told me she shows disinterest by giving guys she doesn’t like a platonic nickname.

After that dude sent her some texts about his day, she’d go:


That’s great, bud

Cruel, but effective. Although some guys still didn’t get the message that she wasn’t interested…

Another telltale sign of disinterest is:

The other person’s texts are colorless. No joking. No flirting. No depth. Just lifeless chit-chat.

Lastly, and hopefully redundant, the person on the other end sends you texts like:

Who is this?

Or refers to you as:


Or any other variation.

How to know if someone hates you: Ask the right way

We have gone over A LOT of signs that show if someone dislikes you over text.

Did the above clues still leave some doubt about what that person thinks of you?

Then the best way to figure it out, is open and honest communication.

If you feel someone is not giving you what you’d expect… isn’t investing as much or is being disrespectful… you should talk about that.

If someone is important to you, but you don’t know how they feel about you, stop wasting time guessing.

Just ask.

I know it’s scary because you might get a response you don’t like. But wouldn’t you rather know the truth?

Let me give you an idea of what I mean.

Hey, could be me but I’m getting the feeling you’re not really digging this convo

Which is totally fine

Just lemme know and I’ll leave you alone

The beauty of this text?

  • It’s bold and honest
  • It’s respectful
  • It’s chill

Which means you can’t go wrong asking it this way. No matter what her answer is.

Louis Farfields

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